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Monday, November 7, 2011

Calling In Sick To Your Boss: 15 Funniest New Excuses


Claiming your young daughter stole your car is just one of many bizarre excuses to miss work.
From Denny:  When you don't feel like going in to work, pull out your little Black Book Of Funny Excuses.  Well, there is a new edition in town since a career survey was conducted.

During the colder weather of autumn and winter most people call in sick due to illness like colds and flu.  Illness accounts for 39 percent of employees missing in action, according to the survey.

But then there are the creative types who just want an excuse to spend more time with their families.  Others just want to spend more time in bed because the weather is too crappy to deal with.  Or the procrastinators realize they need to get in some last minute holiday shopping.

So, what hilarious excuses are this generation of employees offering up as savory mind candy to their bosses?  If I were their boss I would give them the day off just for creativity and the boldness to try to sell something so absolutely ridiculous.


15 Funniest New Excuses for Calling In Sick to Your Boss

1) My 12-year-old daughter stole my car that was my only way to get to work.  He was reluctant to report his daughter's (imaginary) theft to the police.

2) Bats got in my hair and you know how crazy bats can get doing ugly things to your hair.

3) Uh, a refrigerator fell on me.

4) I stopped to get my morning coffee on the way to work.  While I was in line I saw a dump truck drive up that was full of flour and saw it back into my convertible and empty said flour into my car.

5) It's hunting season and a deer bit me.

6) I ate too much at a weekend party.

7) I was in such a hurry to get to work while I was still half asleep from the time change that I fell out of bed and broke my nose this morning.

8) I got a cold from my new puppy.

9) My toddler thought it was funny to stick a mint up his nose so I had to go to the ER to get it removed.

10) I hurt my back while I was chasing a beaver. (a little double meaning on that one)

11) When I got out of bed this morning to come to work I accidentally got my toe caught in the heat register vent cover.

12) I couldn't come to work this morning because of all the garage sales I went to this weekend.  They gave me a bad headache.

13) I couldn't come to work this morning because I got a call from the FBI informing me that my brother-in-law was kidnapped by a drug cartel while visiting Mexico.

14) This morning I drank anti-freeze by mistake and had to go to the hospital.

15) This weekend I went to a bowling alley.  I got hit on the head by a bucket of water that crashed through the ceiling because they had a leak at the bowling alley and the bucket overflowed.








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