In case it's too blurry to read easily here's the text as some of it was chopped off on the page I found it:
Secret to Longevity
A passerby noticed an old lady sitting on her front step, " I couldn't help noticing how happy you look! What is your secret for a long happy life?"
The old lady replied, "I smoke 4 packs of cigarettes a day," she said. "Before I go to bed I smoke a nice big joint. After that I drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels bourbon every week, oh, and I eat only junk food. On the weekends I pop a huge number of pills and do no exercise at all."
"That's absolutely amazing at your age!" declared the well impressed passerby. "Just how old are you?"
"Twenty-four."