Showing posts with label cooking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cooking. Show all posts

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Dennys Food and Recipes: Thanksgiving: Layered Pumpkin Cheesecake



Photo provided by Betty Crocker  --  Layered Pumpkin Cheesecake will be a welcome treat any time during the holidays.

Dennys Food and Recipes: Thanksgiving: Layered Pumpkin Cheesecake: From Denny:  This is the perfect holiday table dessert!  It's so showy it's sure to impress.  Three layers of tasty goodness are the gingersnap cookie crust as it's sturdy foundation to hold the spiced pumpkin cheese layer that is marbled with a vanilla layer.

Like most big cheesecakes, this one should be baked in a springform pan, where the cake cools in the pan for several hours before you remove the sides of the pan.  If you have never used a springform pan, it's so easy it will make you laugh, definitely nothing to be intimidated about at all.

Like any tasty cheesecake, this one is rich in calories too, so a small serving would be welcomed by most.  At a dinner party I like to cut a normal to small sized slice, placing it on one plate and then encourage couples to share so people don't have to feel guilty about busting their diet plan.  After all, the whole point of entertaining is for people to enjoy their tasty treats!...



Geaux Wear Pink! Apron



Help support women on their journey to wellness and hope for a cure!

Visit Denny Lyon Gifts  @ CafePress.com  -  see what's new!  

Also, please remember that October is Breast Cancer Awareness month, keeping these women in your thoughts and prayers.  Here's my latest Denny Lyon Gifts design (at Cafe Press) to honor all the fabulous women and their supporters fighting this disease.

This design first started off as one of my photos of those favorite hot pink azalea blooms, in addition to many other filters, employing a kaleidoscope filter to create this abstract medallion effect. This design reminds me of how our beauty is always there, no matter what form it takes.  Of course, here in Louisiana, we take creative "French" license with English spellings. :)  The thought bubble is to remind others to support these women on their journey to wellness.  Lots of other styles of t-shirts and other products to enjoy too.  The link takes you to the page of all the products featuring this design.  Thanks for visiting!

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Dennys Food and Recipes: Fall Recipe: Breakfast Or Dessert Enjoy Spiced Golden Apples



Advocate staff photo by HEATHER MCCLELLAND -- For an extra-special breakfast or dessert, offer Golden Spiced Apples warm from the oven.
Photo: Heather McClelland/2TheAdvocate.com

Dennys Food and Recipes: Fall Recipe: Breakfast Or Dessert Enjoy Spiced Golden Apples: From Denny:  It's Autumn and time to enjoy cooking apple dishes!  What smells better than apples baking in the oven?  Talk about making the house smell good.

This is an easy dish to make for your family, one they will request often.  Our house prefers dark brown sugar in place of the usual white sugar, your choice, because both taste good.

Saigon cinnamon is quite an awesome choice too.  Found that at Whole Foods locally but I'm sure it's available at other stores in your area.  Just take the time to check.  Saigon cinnamon has more of the "cinnamon" taste and smell we all love, better than the generic cinnamon offered by most spice companies.  You will be familiar with it if you frequent coffee houses.

How much do you know about all the new varieties of apples?  Have you tried any of them?  Seems like there is always something new to explore at the grocery store.  Many of the new apples are crosses between two really outstanding varieties.  Hey, more is better, so why not!  Try picking up two new varieties on each grocery visit and then compare them for taste and texture. While there are over 100 apple varieties in the United States, we only see the best sellers at our grocery stores...


Geaux Wear Pink! Women's All Over Print T-Shirt

Help support breast cancer awareness and hope for the cure! Design available in many t-shirts styles for men, women and kids and on other products like mugs, coffee mugs, blankets, pot holders, hoodies too!

Visit Denny Lyon Gifts  @ CafePress.com  -  see what's new!  

Also, please remember that October is Breast Cancer Awareness month, keeping these women in your thoughts and prayers.  Here's my latest Denny Lyon Gifts design (at Cafe Press) to honor all the fabulous women and their supporters fighting this disease.

This design first started off as one of my photos of those favorite hot pink azalea blooms, in addition to many other filters, employing a kaleidoscope filter to create this abstract medallion effect. This design reminds me of how our beauty is always there, no matter what form it takes.  Of course, here in Louisiana, we take creative "French" license with English spellings. :)  The thought bubble is to remind others to support these women on their journey to wellness.  Lots of other styles of t-shirts and other products to enjoy too.  The link takes you to the page of all the products featuring this design.  Thanks for visiting!


Sunday, October 12, 2014

Dennys Food and Recipes: Easy Fall Recipe: Sauteed Red Cabbage With Apples


Advocate staff photo by HEATHER MCCLELLAND -- Now is the perfect time to try October Red Cabbage and Apple Sauté.
Photo: Heather McClelland @ 2TheAdvocate.com

Dennys Food and Recipes: Easy Fall Recipe: Sauteed Red Cabbage With Apples: From Denny:  Red cabbage is both a pretty color for the table and an easy vegetable to cook up quickly.  Red cabbage, like regular green cabbage, is great for your skin, an added health benefit!  Who wants wrinkles?  Dine regularly on chicken and cabbage and you sure won't need to bother with silly botox injections or face lifts.  We really are what we eat.  It helps when it tastes good too!

Now that many varieties of apples are in season you can enjoy your favorite apple paired with red cabbage.  All you do is first steam the cabbage. Then saute the apples with some onions in butter, adding the steamed cabbage.

Ahead of time I like to clarify the butter to remove the artery clogging milk fats and it also makes it easier to store at room temperature if you desire, once filtered of the milk fats.  I use a small tea strainer once it's cooled enough to go into a storage container.  I also prefer cooking with Vidalia sweet onions or red onions, sometimes called purple onions or Bermudas, but that's just my personal preference.  This recipe calls for yellow onions.  You decide what your family enjoys best.  Once the cabbage is just cooked through then stir in the cider vinegar and brown sugar mixture...


Geaux Wear Pink! Women's All Over Print T-Shirt

Help support breast cancer awareness and hope for the cure! Design available in many t-shirts styles for men, women and kids and on other products like mugs, coffee mugs, blankets, pot holders, hoodies too!

Visit Denny Lyon Gifts  @ CafePress.com  -  see what's new!  

Also, please remember that October is Breast Cancer Awareness month, keeping these women in your thoughts and prayers.  Here's my latest Denny Lyon Gifts design (at Cafe Press) to honor all the fabulous women and their supporters fighting this disease.

This design first started off as one of my photos of those favorite hot pink azalea blooms, in addition to many other filters, employing a kaleidoscope filter to create this abstract medallion effect. This design reminds me of how our beauty is always there, no matter what form it takes.  Of course, here in Louisiana, we take creative "French" license with English spellings. :)  The thought bubble is to remind others to support these women on their journey to wellness.  Lots of other styles of t-shirts and other products to enjoy too.  The link takes you to the page of all the products featuring this design.  Thanks for visiting!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Funny Thanksgiving Quotes, Video, Cartoons and Food Posts

Enjoy some Thanksgiving humor along with more delectable recipes to make your mouth water waiting for the next holiday.




From Denny:  Funny Thanksgiving quotes, a funny Thanksgiving dance video, funny Thanksgiving cartoons, an hilarious post featuring fighting turkeys with captions, another funny post about the infamous Gluttony Pants now in holiday fashion -  and lots of great food. What more could you ask for after a great meal while cruising the web? Uh... maybe a waist extender for my pants? Oh, yeah... but the food was soooo good! :)

And a few serious gratitude posts to round out the season...

Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone, and hope you enjoy your holiday!


Funny posts:

Funny Holiday Fashion: Gluttony Pants - Get the latest holiday clothing to ensure comfortable holiday feasting.

21 Funny Thanksgiving Fighting Turkey Photos

Funny Thanksgiving Presidential Pardon 4 Turkeys Apple and Cider - Check out some funny trivia about presidential turkey pardons.

Monday Lite: Late Night Jokes, Thanksgiving and TSA Cartoons - 22 Nov 2010

Funny Thanksgiving Quotes - Cheeky Quote Day! 25 Nov 2009

5 Funny Thanksgiving Quotes, Photos

Geeky Girl Gone Wild: Happy Thanksgiving Dance!

Editorial Cartoons Roundup 28 Nov 2009


And a few serious posts:

A Man In Love - A true story of just how far a man will go to survive when he is in love during war time. A Thanksgiving holiday poem.

A Prayer of Wisdom From An Unknown Confederate Soldier

111 Insightful Life Quotes

How Does Gratitude Unlock the Fullness of Life?



                                             
                                                             Emeril's Brined Turkey



Thanksgiving Food:

Chef Emeril Cooks Holiday Menu: 7 Delicious Recipes - Cook your holiday feast with favorite chef Emeril Lagasse.

6 Easy Turkey Thanksgiving Recipes and Gravy, Roasting Tips and Advice

8 Cajun Thanksgiving Turkey Recipes, BBQ Turkey, Deep Fry Turkey, Roasting Tips

Chicago Chef Jimmy Bannos Cajun Thanksgiving Menu of 12 Recipes

Chef Paul Deen: Easy Holiday Cola-Basted Ham, Cranberry Sauce - Check out a simple recipe that is always a bit hit with family and friends during the holiday season.

Chef Lidia Bastianich: Easy Italian Christmas Cookie Recipes - Chef Lidia Bastianich shares Italian holiday cookies from her childhood.

Martha Stewart Thanksgiving Recipes: Pumpkin Bread Pudding, Pumpkin Donut Muffins - Martha Stewart shares a couple of her holiday recipes of what else you can make with that iconic autumnal food: pumpkin.

Chef Thomas Keller: Thanksgiving Brunch Recipes - Check out one of best chefs in America and a wonderful brunch menu for the holidays.

Easy Holiday Pasta From Chef Michael Chiarello - Check out some easy holiday ideas using pasta to make a spectacular and tasty meal sure to impress everyone - 3 recipes.

Fall Comfort Food NYC Chef Style: Braised Osso Buco, Risotto, Salad - Check out how to make Italian comfort food in an hour, all done in the oven - 3 recipes.

Pumpkin Risotto, Crispy Bread Soffritto, and Pumpkin Chile Recipes

Unusual Exotic Thanksgiving Menu, Poll on Turkey Vs. Sides Debate


*** Feathered Turkey Photo by eye of einstein @ flickr



*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

*** Check out Holiday Recipes From Dennys Food and Recipes

The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Best Spiritual Posts - my own best as well as links to other spiritual posts from all viewpoints
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Friday, August 13, 2010

Funny News: 100 Year Old Scotch Whiskey Thaws Out to Drink

*** Strange but true: check out this funny news of the day.




From Denny: Check it out! After spending a 100 years frozen in the ice of Antarctica, a bottle of 1896 Scotch is now ready to be poured out for your enjoyment. The famous bottle is in Christ Church, New Zealand. Awwww, the Kiwis get all the fun...

Actually, no one is going to drink the stuff - unless some enterprising museum curator sneaks a sip or two over the next century. The bottle of whiskey was recovered from an Antarctica expedition of Sir Earnest Shackleton and is being preserved in a museum. They found the bottle back in 2006 and the crates have been thawed very slowly since then. Eleven bottles were found wrapped in paper and straw to protect them from the elements.

Of course, those of us who have put a bottle of liquor in the freezer from time to time - like gin, vodka or Jager Meister - know that alcohol doesn't freeze at those temperatures. Neither did these bottles. When the crates were found they could hear the whiskey sloshing around inside the bottles. I guess researchers took their time thawing out the crates to preserve the crates, not the liquor.

While right now the museum is claiming the bottles will never be poured out for drinking, they are allowing brew meisters a chance to take samples. Why? To see if they can replica the 1896 brew.

Museum folks might want to reconsider the pouring of at least a few bottles. Why? It would be great for fund raising. What a unique experience for the folks who love good spirits! :)



Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy





Photo of largest collection of Scotch whiskey in Edinburgh, Scotland by Danny Nicholson @ flickr


*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 18 July 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science and health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.






The Social Poets:


Dark Humor: BP Oil Spill Cartoons - 17 July 2010

America, World Politics, Sports Cartoons - 17 July 2010

Sweltering Summer Heat poem - Libations Friday 9 July 2010

BP Plays Games With Oil Spill, Democrats Face Huge Losses in November

Funny Texting Quotes - Cheeky Quote Day 14 July 2010

Why Obama Is Failing Miserably At Running America

Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 12 July 2010

Funny Video: Colbert Mocks Republican Men Hairstyles

Colbert: Rent a White Guy in China For Business Meeting Prestige

Funny Video: Colbert Rips Glenn Beck For His "Wildly Important" Work

Celebrity: Chelsea Clinton Wedding Day Details

Posts Roundup of Dennys Blogs - 11 July 2010




Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


Kabbalah Quotes: How to Know You Are On The Right Path For You

Madonna Offends Traditional Jewish Kabbalists in Israel




The Healing Waters:


How To Exercise Effectively On A Hot Day: Drink A Slushie

How Bad Is High-Fructose Corn Syrup For Your Health?




The Soul Calendar:


Popular Funny X-ray Pin-Ups Calendar: Stripped to the Bone

Are These Fossils The Earliest Traces Of Complex Life?




Dennys Funny Quotes:


Hunh?! Cartoons - 17 July 2010

Funny GOP: Ridiculous Republicans Dictionary

Funny GOP: The 10 Commandments Republican Style

Funny LOL Work Jokes

Funny GOP: Limbaughs 18 Rules of Right Wing Talk Show Bombast

Funny GOP: Conservatives Prayer to Capitalism God




Dennys Food and Recipes:


How To Make Your Own Pimento Cheese Spread From Southern Living Magazine

Easy Healthy Dessert: Orange Gel n Fresh Fruit

Craving Ice: Is It A Sign of Anemia?

Cake Tuesday: 4 Cakes Celebrating America

Muffin Monday: Chocolate Chip Orange Muffins




Visual Insights:


Cartoons: America and Immigration - 17 July 2010

Funny Comic Betty White Gets Her Own Calendar

Photography and Poetry: Release Your Dreams and Spring into Life



*** Photo by heliosphan @ flickr


*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets
The Soul Calendar
Visual Insights
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations
Poems From A Spiritual Heart
The Healing Waters
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs 9 May 2010




From Denny: This sure has been a wild ride for the news, the BP oil spill attempt at clean-up, the crazy British election and the huge sudden drop in the stock market. I gathered some of the better stories over at Dennys Global Politics.

You just have to read about the odd new health stories about empathy nasal spray for men and the strange neck treatment for PTSD relief. And the political cartoons were out in full force as social commentary on it all so you know I just had to park a number of those posts on several blogs for Saturday! :)

Hope everyone had a great Mothers Day! And thank you all for your great support!




The Social Poets:


Oil Spill Disaster Cartoons - Whats Happening This Week in America - 8 May 2010

One Mother and One Child poem 4 Mothers Day - Libations Friday 7 May 2010

Transocean Kidnapped Oil Rig Survivors, Coerced Signing No Legal Repsonsiblity

Funny Parenting Quotes 4 Mothers Day - Cheeky Quote Day 5 May 2010

BP Only Responsible to $75 Million 4 Oil Disaster By USA Law

Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 3 May 2010

Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs 2 May 2010





Dennys Global Politics:

Greek Debt Crisis 4 The World: Political Cartoons 8 May 2010

1,000 Point Stock Market Plunge, Brits Still Tied After Election, Examining Obamas Humor - News Headlines 7 May 2010

USA Offshore New Oil Drilling Halted, New USA Terrorist Screening, 3-Way Tie in Brit Election - News Headlines 6 May 2010

Supreme Court Pick Hunt, Dems Whimp Out on Finanacial Fund 4 Reform, How You Get on No-Fly List, Obama Tough on Airlines - News Headlines 5 May 2010

Pakistan Trained Bomber, Obamas Workaholic Ways, Catholics Polled About Sex Abuse - News Headlines 4 May 2010

BP Oil Spill Coverage - News Headlines 3 May 2010





The Soul Calendar:


Funny Wall Street Cartoons - 8 May 2010


Video: Check Out the River Monsters Swimming Near You


Bloggers: Get The New Google Buzz Buttons

Neuroscience: Want Your Man to Better Understand You? Try Empathy Nasal Spray




The Healing Waters:


Controversial Successful New Treatment 4 Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder




Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


Mothers Day Quote From Rose Kennedy

How Can You Help Your Child Keep Their Balance And Yours?




Dennys Funny Quotes:


The Great American Immigration Debate: Political Cartoons - 8 May 2010

Funny Video: Health Care Rage-Ex by Cartoonist Mark Fiore

Funny Animated Cartoon on Economy: Crashiversary Video by Mark Fiore



Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious And Odd:


Times Square Terrorist Bomber: Political Cartoons 8 May 2010

10 Funny Odd Photos - cute animals and crazy dressed people!

Funny Video: TV Anchor Falls off Chair





Food blogs:


Tradtional Sandwiches Updated: California Tuna Melt, Egg Salad

Chocolate Wonders: Kentucky Derby Pie, Make-ahead Chocolate Soufflé

Video: Louisiana Chef Makes Crawfish Etouffee


Easy Moist Chocolate Mayo Cake From Bon Appetit





Visual Insights:


Dennys Photo Gallery: Garden Views

Funny Love-Hate Relationships of Fox News, Republicans, Tea Party, Airlines and Obama Cartoons - 8 May 2010


*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Weekly Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 11 Apr 2010

From Denny: This has been a wild week. The starting weeks of pollen season and we all have been sneezing and experiencing watery eyes and sheer misery. I've come to the conclusion that the attack of the killer plants is all about putting our bodies on overload so we will start dumping winter's toxins. Spring is the time of year when our livers go through detox - and do it for free! The Big However is that it can be inconvenient scheduling to say the least. When the liver starts detoxing you get sluggish, lethargic and sleepy, not exactly productive. See? Nothing is wrong with you after all; it's just Nature's regular Spring house cleaning. Tell that to your boss while you are dragging in to work or not as peppy as usual... :)

Seems like Blogger has had issues this week as well. It's been sheer hell trying to get anything published. The old editor will accept editing and copy and paste but won't publish. The new editor will not accept editing or copy and paste but hey! just push the publish button and it works! Totally crazy with all the toggling back and forth between Blogger dashboards...

But the good news is that after waiting over a year for a fix on the Google Connect for those of us with blogs that carry Google ads, we no longer experience disappearing followers. I always try to put these widgets on all my blogs so other bloggers can advertise their blogs too when they become followers. That's how many of my readers found me - by seeing me listed as a follower or visitor on someone else's blog. So, please be sure to join up on the various blogs to make sure you get seen - and I have plenty of fellow bloggers as company to keep me sassy! :)

Oh, and if you are a fellow blogger, make sure you count your blog stats with your feed counts. Feedburner does a stellar job of counting your views, clicks and visits to your blogs. These views may not be physical visitors to your blog as they are viewing in a reader - so won't get counted by your blog counters. I finally got around to adding in my feed counts to the totals and was pleasantly surprised and downright shocked at all the counts I had not known were always waiting to be noticed. This week alone over 105,000 folks showed up or viewed in a reader posts on all my blogs. Thank you for such a fabulous response, especially over at Delicious social site! You are amazing! Do try to pay a physical visit to the blogs as each one is created with a specific theme, color sense and emotional or spiritual feel to benefit the reader.

It's funny how when you start a blog - The Social Poets was my first - you never realize how things are going to morph and grow. When I branched off into other blogs to park different themed posts like spiritual quotes and my spiritual thoughts about them over at Beautiful Illustrated Quotations it has been astounding the response for what I figured would be a small niche market. Well, I sure was wrong about that assumption.

When I was having fun tripping through the Creative Commons area of Flickr and put up themed posts over at my photo blog, Visual Insights, again folks flocked to grin along with me! Who knew how much fun we all could have together? Serious or funny - readers are interested in good content. Sooner or later they will find you. So, if you are like I was 18 months ago, thrilled just to have 20 people a month show up at my first blog but wondering how anyone would find out about what my blog was offering, don't despair. Bookmark your posts and your readers will begin to find you through the search engines and social sites. It just takes time.


Here's a tax season grin since I just spent three hours doing my taxes:









The Social Poets:


Whats Happening in America, This Weeks Political Cartoons - 10 Apr 2010

Opinion: Obama Issues Kill Order 4 American Cleric

Funny Allergy Quotes - Cheeky Quote Day 7 Apr 2010

How to Survive Allergy and Pollen Season

Monday Roundup of Late Night Comedy - 5 Apr 2010





Dennys Global Politics:


Iran Pushing 4 Nukes, Reprocessing Spent Nuke Fuel, Palin Unpopular, Political Death Threats - News Headlines 9 Apr 2010

USAs New Weapon Global Strike, U.S.-Russia Nuke Deal, Who Does Not Pay Taxes in America, U.S. Kill Order 4 Cleric - News Headlines 8 Apr 2010

America Not Ready 4 Cyberattacks, Pelosi Death Threats, Iraq Violence, Kyrgyzstan Riots, Skinhead Leaves Hate Behind - News Headlines 7 Apr 2010

Obamas Nuke Policy, China Hacks India, Britain Votes, Net Neutrality, Guilt Study, News Headlines 6 Apr 2010

Breakdown of Who Are Tea Party Members, Bizarre Karzai, Obama Picks New Justice Soon, Immunity for Pope - News Headlines 5 Apr 2010





Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


Poem: Legacy of Love

Your Dreams: 5 Common Characteristics

Still popular on BIQ: Does Your Life Feel Like a Disaster?

3 Quotes About Facing Tough Times

Uplifting Soul Quote: What is Your Power in the World?

Spiritual Energy: Can Simple Words Add to Our Quality of Life?





The Soul Calendar - science:


What Do All the Recent Global Earthquakes Mean?

Come to Iceland: Experience Living With a Volcano in Your Back Yard

Moon Water: Order Up Your Cocktail Today

New Astronomy Photos: Cosmic Rosebud, Winds of Change Black Hole, Orion Nebula





The Healing Waters:


How to Survive Allergy and Pollen Season

A Poem About Healing Ourselves

Unlocking Foods Healing Powers

Good News: Afghan Orphanage Female Director Honored

Beautiful Metaphor for Life: Boats





Food blogs:


Spring Into Grill Season: Mouthwatering Steaks

Chef Rocco Dispiritos Cheap Yet Healthy Comfort Food

Yummy Homemade Coconut Cream Pie

Play Fun With Your Food: Mini Frittata Crostinis, Mini Wonton Quiches

Awesome Sauces 4 Spring and Summer Seafood

Forget the Birds: Awesome Recipes 4 Stale Bread





Humor blogs:


Funny Surfing Peruvian Alpaca

Outrageously Dumb Criminals: Robbers Called Bank For Money To Go

The Funny Side of Allergy Season - Ahh, Choo!


Funny Comics Review The News - 26 Mar 2010





Visual Insights - photo blog:


Funny Odd Couples: Cats and Their Weirdo Friends


Dennys Photo Gallery: Spectacular Sunrises





*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

Sunday, March 21, 2010

41 Post Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 21 Mar 2010




From Denny: Catch up on posts at all of Denny's blogs. Lots of choices from news, political humor, political opinion, science news, poetry, motivational quotes and spiritual thoughts, great recipes and humor. And hey, if you would like to bookmark this on your fav social site, it sure would make my day! :)


The Social Poets:

Health Care Reform Resistance, Funny Political Cartoons - 20 Mar 2010

The 11 Choices poem - Libations Friday 19 Mar 2010

Fleecing America: Political Hypocrites Drenched in Stimulus Money

Funny Sarcastic Sayings for St. Patricks Day - Cheeky Quote Day 17 Mar 2010

2 Months Later: Haiti Still Suffers Yet Has Faith

Funny Late Night Comedy Roundup - 15 Mar 2010

29 Post Roundup at Dennys Blogs 14 Mar 2010



Dennys Global Politics:


Health Care Vote and What You Get, Iraq War Anniversary - News Roundup 21 Mar 2010

Latest on Health Care Bill - Headlines Roundup 19 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 16 Mar 2010 - Religious Sex Scandals, Scientology Abuses, Lost Shakespeare Found

News Headlines Roundup 15 Mar 2010 - CEO Bonuses, Life in Antarctica, Old Europe

News Headlines Roundup 12 Mar 2010 - W.H. Press Sec and Canada Bet, American Adooption, Americas Yellow Journalism

News Headlines Roundup 10 Mar 2010 - Rep. Patrick Kennedy outburst in House

Funny Colbert Interviews Erickson, Head of Conservative RedState.com



Beautiful Illustrated Quotes:


Does Your Life Feel Like a Disaster?

3 Quotes About Facing Tough Times




Food blogs:


Moistest Low Cal Chocolate Cake, Pesto Veggie Lasagna, Quick Salad

Gorgeous Whiskey Chocolate Brownies

5 Super Easy Chocolate Desserts: Only 5 Ingredients

4 Star Food on a Budget: Pecan Chicken, Salad, Orzo, Sweet Cheese Tarts

Martha Stewarts 4 Fast Spring Recipes

New Orleans Recipes: Crawfish Etouffee, Chicken and Sausage Gumbo, Jambalaya, Sazerac Cocktail

Stop That Cold in Its Tracks: Illness Fighting Foods

Check Out Statistics 4 Real Cost of Fast Food vs. Whole

Chef Mario Batalis 3 Saltimbocca Recipe Variations

Olympics Seafood Dish: Pan Roasted Black Cod, Sunchokes, Lentils and Mushrooms



Science @ The Soul Calendar:

Check Out This Tripping New Look for the Milky Way

New Finding Under Antarctic Ice: Stinky Greenhouse Gas Ready to Go Boom

Friday Trivia: 14 Useless Random Facts

Comics Point of View: Our Weird Politicians



Humor Blogs:

Funny Sarcastic Sayings 4 Any Day

Funny News: Italys World Slow Day

Weird News: Watching Porn in Church

7 Funny Quips 10 Mar 2010

8 Funny Quips



Visual Insights:

Photography, Beautiful Metaphor for Life: 17 Boats

Only White Theme: 26 Photos

Photo History: 1st Lady Gowns, Michelle Obama Donates Hers

16 Beautiful Creative Angel Photos

10 Make You Think Fantasy Photos

30 Funny Creative Animal Ads


*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers - and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

Sunday, March 14, 2010

29 Post Roundup at Dennys Blogs 14 Mar 2010




From Denny: Remember me? You know, the woman who was pining away, waiting for Winter to leave and Spring to come? Yeah, well, the past two weeks here in south Louisiana the tree pollen blast has forced me to practically buy stock in the Kleenex brand of nose tissues. :) With all the fun Spring has sprung on my immune system I had to dial it back and was not able to write as many posts. You know that amusing but true proverbial saying of "Politics is so ugly; it's like making sausage"? Writing this past week has not been much prettier. Lucky you that you don't have blogger video cam! :)

I started keeping up with the news headlines over at Dennys Global Politics, partly to go back and write an opinion piece, partly just to see what's out there across the media spectrum. There are mainstream stories along with the obscure you might not have noticed. The stories are excerpted yet provided with links so you can read in more detail if you prefer.

There are many awesome recipes to enjoy, along with the food video tutorials. There are a few poems and spiritual thoughts to consider. There is a science post about just how much the Chilean earthquake affected the planet, pretty scary stuff. And, of course, my total favorites: lots of rocking good humor posts with funny videos I find while checking in with my social sites. What would life be without friends?



Cartoonists Cajun Whoop A$$ on Everyone - 40 Funny Political Cartoons - 13 Mar 2010

Dennys Popular Poems Roundup 12 Mar 2010

Photo History: 1st Lady Gowns, Michelle Obama Donates Hers

St. Patricks Day Funnies and History - Cheeky Quote Day 10 Mar 2010

Photography: 16 Beautiful Creative Angel Photos

Funny Late Night Comedy Roundup - 8 March 2010

48 Post Roundup: Dennys Blogs 7 Mar 2010




Chilean Earthquake Shortened Earths Day

Step Out into the Unknown with Ease

Shoes in Church poem

A Poem to Think About When You Dream

30 Funny Creative Animal Ads




5 Super Easy Chocolate Desserts: Only 5 Ingredients

Warm Gooey Cheese Fondue 4 Cold Nights

Martha Stewarts 4 Fast Spring Recipes

Unusual Outrageous New Food: Breast Milk Cheese

Chef Mario Batalis Easy 3 Pork Saltimbocca Recipes

Check Out Statistics 4 Real Cost of Fast Food vs. Whole

Chef Jamie Oliver Discovers American Kids Dont Know Veggies



Some of my choices from the day's news, excerpted and with links to full stories, some video clips:

News Headlines Roundup 12 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 11 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 10 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 9 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 8 Mar 2010





7 Funny Quips 10 Mar 2010

13 Funny Quips 9 Mar 2010

Funny Music Video: Hilarious Organized Mayhem

Funny Video: Look, Ma! Eating with No Paws But Real Hands!

Outrageous Funny Video: Procrastination



*** THANKS for visiting, come back often, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers - and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

Monday, November 16, 2009

Funny Cooking Quotes



Photo by TimWilson @ flickr

From Denny: Since I just found out that Blogger only backs up posts and not the links in the sidebar or anything else on the blog... figured it was a great idea to put all my quotes lists into category posts. The blog should load faster too as it will reduce the number of links on the sidebar. Have fun grinning at how some people cook! :)

Quotes

* A food is not necessarily essential just because your child hates it. - Katharine Whitehorn

* A good meal makes a man feel more charitable toward the world than any sermon. - Arthur Pendenys

* A hungry stomach seldoms scorns plain food. - Horace

* A smiling face is half the meal. - Latvian Proverb

* All you see, I owe to spaghetti. - Sophia Loren, actress

* Blow in its ear. - Johnny Carson on the best way to thaw out a frozen turkey

* Cooking is like love. It should be entered into with abandon or not at all. - Harriet Van Horne

* Cooking Rule... If at first you don't succeed, order pizza. - Anonymous

* Dessert is probably the most important stage of the meal, since it will be the last thing your guests remember before they pass out all over the table. - The Anarchist Cookbook

* Eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow they may make it illegal. - Anonymous

* Eating an artichoke is like getting to know someone really well. - Willi Hastings

* Even were a cook to cook a fly, he would keep the breast for himself. - Polish Proverb

* Fervet olla, vivit amicitia: While the pot boils, friendship endures. (Meaning the man who gives good dinners has plenty of friends). - Latin Proverb

* Fish, to taste right, must swim three times -- in water, in butter and in wine. - Polish Proverb

* Food is an important part of a balanced diet. - Anonymous

* Give a man a fish and he has food for a day; teach him how to fish and you can get rid of him of the entire weekend. - Zenna Schaffer

* Give me books, French wine, fruit, fine weather and a little music played out of doors by somebody I do not know. - John Keats

* God sends meat and the devil sends cooks. - Thomas Deloney (1543-1600)

* He was a bold man who first swallowed an oyster. - James I Cheese--milk's leap towards immortality. - Clifton Fadiman

* Hunger finds no fault with the cooking. - Proverb

* Hunger is the best sauce in the world. - Cervantes

* Hungry men think the cook lazy. - Anonymous

* I don't eat snails. I prefer fast food. - Strange de Jim

* I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

* I prefer my oysters fried; That way I know my oysters died. - Roy G. Blount, Jr.

* I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, “What for?” I said, “I'm going to buy some sugar.” - Steven Wright

* I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead - not sick, not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

* In Mexico we have a word for sushi: bait. - Jose Simon

* It's so beautifully arranged on the plate - you know someone's fingers have been all over it. - Julia Child on nouvelle cuisine

* Kissing don't last: cookery do. - George Meredith

* Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving. - Rosalind Russell

* Life is too short to stuff a mushroom. - Storm Jameson

* Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them. - Samuel Butler

* Mothers, food, love, and career: the four major guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

* My idea of heaven is a great big baked potato and someone to share it with. - Oprah Winfrey

* My wife and I tried to breakfast together, but we had to stop or our marriage would have been wrecked. - Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)

* My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way. - Henry Youngman

* Never eat more than you can lift. - Miss Piggy of The Muppets fame

* No man is lonely while eating spaghetti; it requires so much attention. – Robert Morley

* Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

* Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside. - Mark Twain (1835-1910)

* Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese. - G. K. Chesterson (1874-1936)

* Recipe For Chili: Put a pot of chili on the stove to simmer. Let it simmer. Meanwhile, broil a good steak. Eat the steak. Let the chili simmer. Ignore it. - Allan Shivers, former governor of Texas
Reminds me of my safari in Africa.

* Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. -W. C. Fields (1880-1946)

* Strange to see how a good dinner and feasting reconciles everybody. - Samuel Pepys

* The discovery of a new dish does more for the happiness of mankind than the discovery of a star. - Anthelme Brillat-Savarin

* The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

* The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American proverb

* The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. - Calvin Trillin

* The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not. - Mark Twain

* The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later you're hungry again. - George Miller

* The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it. - Andy Rooney
There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection IS the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted. - Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly

* There is no sincerer love than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)

* There is no such thing as a little garlic. - Anonymous

* There is no such thing as a pretty good omelette. - French Proverb

* There is such a buildup of crud in my oven there is only room to bake a single cupcake. - Phyllis Diller

* Vanity is the food of fools. - Anonymous

* What garlic is to food, insanity is to art. - Anonymous

* What is food to one man may be fierce poison to others. - Lucretius

* What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds. - Cindy Garner

* When compelled to cook, I produce a meal that would make a sword swallower gag. - Russell Baker

* When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking. - Gail Sheehy

* When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat. - Mark Twain

* When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Man invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking. - Elayne Boolser

* Where there's smoke, there's toast. - Anonymous

* Without rice, even the cleverest housewife cannot cook. - Chinese Proverb

* You don't sew with a fork, so I see no reason to eat with knitting needles. - Miss Piggy, on eating Chinese Food

*** Thanks for visiting and come back often for a grin! :)

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Cheeky Quote Day over at The Social Poets 30 Sept 2009



This lampshade chef had a very long day at the hotel kitchen... - Photo by Tracy Hunter @ Flickr

From Denny: Had some fun today and put up a post chock full of funny cooking quotes! When it comes to cooking there are a variety of opinions. Here's a "chef's table" sampling of the cheeky quote menu:

* In France, cooking is a serious art form and a national sport. - Julia Child

* Cooking is like love. It should be entered into with abandon or not at all. - Harriet Van Horne

* The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. - Calvin Trillin

* When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking. - Gail Sheehy

* Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese. - G. K. Chesterson (1874-1936)

* Recipe For Chili: Put a pot of chili on the stove to simmer. Let it simmer. Meanwhile, broil a good steak. Eat the steak. Let the chili simmer. Ignore it. - Allan Shivers, former governor of Texas

* I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead - not sick, not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

* Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

* In Mexico we have a word for sushi: bait. - Jose Simon

For more of Cheeky Quote Day, go here! :)
Related Posts with Thumbnails

This Week's Fav Cartoon

Moderately Confused

Genius

  • A genius is one who can do anything except make a living. - Joey Lauren Adams
  • A genius is one who shoots at something no one else can see - and hits it. - Anonymous
  • A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters
  • A harmless hilarity and a buoyant cheerfulness are not infrequent concomitants of genius; and we are never more deceived than when we mistake gravity for greatness, solemnity for science, and pomposity for erudition. - Charles Caleb Colton
  • Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage - to move in the opposite direction. - E.F. Schumacker
  • Character is higher than intellect. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • Coffee is good for talent, but genius wants prayer. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Common sense is not so common. - Voltaire
  • Every man is a potential genius - until he does something. - Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree
  • Every man of genius is considerably helped by being dead. - Robert S. Lynd
  • Every person of genius is considerably helped by being dead. - Robert S. Lun
  • Every true genius is bound to be naive. - J.C.F. von Schiller
  • Everyone is a genius at least once a year. The real geniuses simply have their bright ideas closer together. - Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
  • Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense. - Josh Billings
  • Genius is an African who dreams up snow. - Vladimir Nabokov
  • Genius is more often found in a cracked pot than in a whole one. - E.B. White
  • Genius is nothing but a great aptitude for patience. - George-Louis de Buffon
  • Genius lasts longer than Beauty. That accounts for the fact that we all take such pains to over-educate ourselves. - Oscar Wilde
  • Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The trouble-makers. The round heads in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status-quo. You can quote them. Disagree with them. Glorify, or vilify them. But the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do. - Apple Computer
  • His genius he was quite content in one brief sentence to define; Of inspiration one percent, of perspiration, ninety nine. - Thomas A. Edison
  • I am convinced all of humanity is born with more gifts than we know. Most are born geniuses and just get de-geniused rapidly. - Buckminster Fuller
  • I can't tell you if genius is hereditary, because heaven has granted me no offspring. - James McNeill Whistler
  • I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up. - Mark Twain, "The Innocents Abroad"
  • I think the world is run by C students. - Al McGuire
  • I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered together at the White House, with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone. - John F. Kennedy, in an address to Nobel Prize winners
  • I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde. - Dolly Parton
  • If children grew up according to early indications, we should have nothing but geniuses. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
  • If the Aborigine drafted an I.Q. test, all of Western civilization would presumably flunk it. - Stanley Garn
  • If the human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we couldn't. - Emerson M. Pugh
  • In every work of genius, we recognize our own rejected thoughts; they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty. - Ralph Waldo Emerson, "Self Reliance," Essays, 1841
  • Mad, adj.: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence. - Ambrose Bierce
  • Man becomes man only by his intelligence, but he is man only by his heart. - Henri Frederic Amiel
  • Men of genius are meteors destined to burn themselves out in lighting up their age. - Napoleon Bonaparte, Discours de Lyon, 1771
  • Passion holds up the bottom of the universe and genius paints up its roof. - Chao Chang
  • Perhaps imagination is only intelligence having fun. - George Scialabra
  • Primitive does not mean stupid. - Anonymous
  • Since when was genius found respectable? - Elizabeth Barrett Browning
  • Some people take more care to hide their wisdom than their folly. - Jonathan Swift, Thoughts on Various Subjects, 1711
  • Sometimes, indeed, there is such a discrepancy between the genius and his human qualities that one has to ask oneself whether a little less talent might not have been better. - Carl Jung
  • Talent is that which is in a man's power; genius is that in whose power a man is. - James Russell Lowell, Literary Essays
  • The course of every intellectual, if he pursues his journey long and unflinchingly enough, ends in the obvious, from which the non-intellectuals have never stirred. - Aldous Huxley
  • The difference between intelligence and education is this: intelligence will make you a good living. - Charles F. Kettering
  • The invention of IQ does a great disservice to creativity in education. - Joel Hildebrand
  • The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius. - Oscar Wilde
  • The reluctance to put away childish things may be a requirement of genius. - Rebecca Pepper Sinkler
  • There is nobody so irritating as somebody with less intelligence and more sense than we have. - Don Herold
  • This is the nature of genius, to be able to grasp the knowable even when no one else recognizes that it is present. - Deepak Chopra
  • Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others. - Mark Twain
  • We know that the nature of genius is to provide idiots with ideas twenty years later. - Louis Aragon
  • We should not only use the brains we have, but all that we can borrow. - President Woodrow Wilson
  • We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality. - Albert Einstein
  • What a distressing contrast there is between the radiant intelligence of the child and the feeble mentality of the average adult. - Sigmund Freud
  • When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. - Jonathan Swift

Advice

  • Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself. - Cicero
  • A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice. - Edgar Watson Howe, Country Town Sayings, 1911
  • I always pass on good advice. It's the only thing to do with it. It is never any use to oneself. - Oscar Wilde, An Ideal Husband, 1895
  • Sometimes I give myself admirable advice, but I am incapable of taking it. - Mary Wortley Montagu
  • I never had a man come to me for advice yet, but what I soon discovered that he thought more of his own opinion than he did of mine. - Josh Billings
  • No one wants advice - only corroboration. - John Steinbeck, The Winter of Our Discontent
  • It is more easy to be wise for others than for ourselves. - François Duc de La Rochefoucauld
  • We hate to have some people give us advice because we know how badly they need it themselves. - Anonymous
  • The best way to succeed in life is to act on the advice we give to others. - Anonymous
  • When we ask advice we are usually looking for an accomplice. - Charles Varlet de La Grange, Pensées, 1872
  • Old men are fond of giving good advice, to console themselves for being no longer in a position to give bad examples. - François La Rochefoucauld
  • The best advice is this: Don't take advice and don't give advice. - Anonymous
  • When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants, and I give it to him. - Henry Wheeler Shaw, a.k.a. Josh Billings
  • Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it. - Gordon R. Dickson
  • Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't. - Erica Jong, How to Save Your Own Life, 1977

Children

  • There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff
  • Children are contemptuous, haughty, irritable, envious, sneaky, selfish, lazy, flighty, timid, liars and hypocrites, quick to laugh and cry, extreme in expressing joy and sorrow, especially about trifles, they'll do anything to avoid pain but they enjoy inflicting it: little men already. - Jean de La Bruyère, Les Caractères, 1688
  • The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old. - Joan Kerr, Please Don't Eat the Daisies, 1957
  • If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers. - Edgar W. Howe
  • There's nothing that can help you understand your beliefs more than trying to explain them to an inquisitive child. - Frank A. Clark
  • Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime. - Red Skelton
  • Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed. - Robert Gallagher
  • Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller
  • Children's talent to endure stems from their ignorance of alternatives. - Maya Angelou, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, 1969
  • Women gather together to wear silly hats, eat dainty food, and forget how unresponsive their husbands are. Men gather to talk sports, eat heavy food, and forget how demanding their wives are. Only where children gather is there any real chance of fun. - Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
  • Children find everything in nothing; men find nothing in everything. - Giacomo Leopardi, Zibaldone Scelto
  • Do your kids a favor - don't have any. - Robert Orben
  • There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and his mother's age. - Benjamin Spock, Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care, 1945
  • A child seldom needs a good talking to as a good listening to. - Robert Brault
  • It is not easy to be crafty and winsome at the same time, and few accomplish it after the age of six. - John W. Gardner and Francesca Gardner Reese
  • What is a home without children? Quiet. - Henny Youngman
  • While we try to teach our children all about life, Our children teach us what life is all about. - Angela Schwindt
  • Little girls are cute and small only to adults. To one another they are not cute. They are life-sized. - Margaret Atwood
  • The prime purpose of being four is to enjoy being four - of secondary importance is to prepare for being five. - Jim Trelease, The Read-Aloud Handbook, 1985
  • In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley
  • A child is a curly dimpled lunatic. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • A little girl is sugar and spice and everything nice - especially when she's taking a nap. - Anonymous
  • Children seldom misquote. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said. - Anonymous (maybe Art Linkletter?)
  • There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • Like fruit, children are sweetest just before they turn bad. - Dena Groquet
  • Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Boy, n.: a noise with dirt on it. - Not Your Average Dictionary
  • Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next. - Franklin P. Jones
  • In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children. The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted. The result is unruly children and childish adults. - Thomas Szasz
  • You are worried about seeing him spend his early years in doing nothing. What! Is it nothing to be happy? Nothing to skip, play, and run around all day long? Never in his life will he be so busy again. - Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Emile, 1762
  • Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man. - Rabindranath Tagore
  • Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky. - Fran Lebowitz
  • Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. - John W. Whitehead, The Stealing of America, 1983
  • Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford
  • A child can ask questions that a wise man cannot answer. - Anonymous
  • Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
  • We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley
  • A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn't act that way very often. - Anonymous
  • You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. - Franklin P. Jones
  • We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. - Stacia Tauscher

About Humor

  • The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Anonymous
  • I think the next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it. - Frank Howard Clark
  • I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humor. - Edward Albee
  • Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully. - Max Eastman
  • Humor is the affectionate communication of insight. - Leo Rosten
  • Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth. - Citor Borge
  • Humor is richly rewarding to the person who employs it. It has some value in gaining and holding attention, but it has no persuasive value at all. - John Kenneth Galbraith
  • A sense of humor... is needed armor. Joy in one's heart and some laughter on one's lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life. - Hugh Sidey
  • A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor, for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself. - Jessammyn West
  • A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of life. - William A. Ward
  • Comedy has to be based on truth. You take the truth and you put a little curlicue at the end. - Sid Caesar
  • Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing. - William James
  • Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven. - Mark Twain
  • Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding. - Agnes Repplier
  • Humor is just another defense against the universe. - Mel Brooks
  • Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn. - Irvin S. Cobb
  • Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs. - Christopher Morley
  • Humor is reason gone mad. - Groucho Marx
  • A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke - and that the joke is oneself. - Clifton Paul Fadiman
  • A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles. - Mignon McLaughlin
  • A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road. - Henry Ward Beecher
  • A joke is a very serious thing. - Winston Churchill

Birthday Quotes

  • Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. - Tom Wilson
  • Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. - Jennifer Yane
  • Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. - Larry Lorenzoni
  • May you live to be a hundred years - With one extra year to repent.
  • The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. - Lucille Ball
  • Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. - Jean Paul Richter
  • A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost
  • I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now.
  • You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience.
  • I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. - George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
  • Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
  • Youth is a disease from which we all recover. - Dorothy Fulheim
  • First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. - Branch Rickey
  • Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. - Bob Hope
  • Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. - Truman Capote
  • Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. - Dan Bennett
  • Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. - Charles Schulz
  • They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body.
  • When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. - Mark Twain
  • The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. - Jerry M. Wright
  • Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing
  • Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. - Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
  • We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.
  • A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip.
  • There is still no cure for the common birthday. - John Glenn
  • Birthdays are like girlfriends, they come and go-unless you enjoy them.
  • Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional. - Chili Davis
  • To me, old age is always 20 years older than I am.
  • You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
  • If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
  • Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
  • Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.
  • Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
  • The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet.
  • Looking fifty is great - if you’re sixty.
  • I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
  • If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
  • After 30, a body has a mind of its own.
  • Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
  • Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
  • It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can’t speak for my twin sister.
  • When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
  • Live as long as you may. The first twenty years are the longest half of your life.
  • When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m five I’ll be 64.
  • Thirty five is a very attractive age; London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty-five for years.
  • Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.
  • About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
  • Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.

Relationships

  • Great men are rarely isolated mountain peaks; they are the summits of ranges. - Thomas W. Higginson
  • I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox. - Woody Allen
  • In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen
  • A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. - Texas Guinan
  • He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland
  • If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one? - Abraham Lincoln
  • Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry
  • The more I see of men, the more I admire dogs. - Jeanne-Marie Roland
  • Women are like Elephants. I like to watch them, but I wouldn't want to own one. - W. C. Fields
  • When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler
  • Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone. - Lenny Bruce
  • Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship. - Oscar Wilde
  • Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use a words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid that area altogether. Trust me - Tim Allen
  • Cosmetics is a boon to every woman, but a girl's best friend is still a nearsighted man. - Yoko Ono
  • Twitter was invented by men. A woman would have chosen a higher character limit.
  • I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. - Bill Cosby
  • If you must have motivation, think of your paycheck on Friday. - Noel Coward
  • True love is like a pair of socks: you gotta have two and they've gotta match. – Groucho Marx
  • I don't have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks. - Groucho Marx
  • Ugly visual: When you're up to your nose in sh*t, keep your mouth shut. - Anonymous
  • If it weren't for women, men would still be wearing last week's socks. - Cynthia Nelms
  • Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy. - Steven Wright
  • I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose. - Woody Allen
  • Love lasteth as long as the money endureth. - William Caxton
  • The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Love is like the measles; we all have to go through it. - Jerome K. Jerome
  • True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. - Erich Segal
  • Sometimes I lie awake at night, & I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than 1 night." - Anonymous
  • "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? – (understandably) Anonymous
  • I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. - Henny Youngman
  • Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet. - Mae West (wink wink)
  • In life; it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out! - Joey Adams

Make You Wanna Wince: Dumbisms

  • If it weren't for the last minute, a lot of things wouldn't get done. - Michael S. Traylor
  • I stand by all the misstatements that I've made. - Dan Quayle
  • The loss of life will be irreplaceable. - Dan Quayle
  • Not only is he ambidextrous, but he can throw with either hand. - Duffy Daugherty, football coach and sports analyst, a word smith he isn't
  • A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. – (understandably) Anonymous, probably from a stoned rocker after a concert
  • If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. - Brooke Shields
  • We are ready for an unforseen event that may or may not occur. - Dan Quayle, VP to Bush 41
  • If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure. - Dan Quayle
  • We are sorry to announce that Mr. Albert Brown has been quite unwell, owing to his recent death, and is taking a short holiday to recover. - Parish Magazine
  • Please provide the date of your death. - from an IRS letter
  • I have opinions of my own - strong opinions - but I don't always agree with them. – President George W. Bush (Bush 43)

Pet Quotes: Funny & Serious

  • When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbet
  • I always like a dog so long as he isn't spelled backward. - G. K. Chesterton
  • Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate. - Sigmund Freud
  • Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. - Roger Caras
  • Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Anne Landers
  • If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain
  • Heaven goes by favor; if it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain
  • A dog is not considered a good dog because he is a good barker. A man is not considered a good man because he is a good talker. - Buddha
  • I've met many thinkers and many cats, but the wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. ~ Hippolyte Taine
  • A dog has lots of friends because he wags his tail and not his tongue. ~ Anonymous
  • The dog represents all that is best in man. ~ Etienne Charlet
  • Love the animals: God has given them the rudiments of thought and joy untroubled. ~ Fyodor Dostoyevsky
  • Every boy should have two things: a dog, and a mother willing to let him have one. ~ Anonymous
  • And God took a handful of Southerly wind, blew His breath over it and created the horse. ~ Bedouin Legend
  • The bird of paradise alights only upon the hand that does not grasp. ~ John Berry
  • A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg. ~ Samuel Butler
  • If I have any beliefs about immortality it is that certain dogs I know will go to heaven, and very – very - few people. ~ James Thurber
  • The Cat. He walked by himself, and all places were alike to him. ~ Rudyard Kipling
  • The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated. ~ Mahatma Gandhi
  • The dog was created especially for children. He is the God of frolic. ~ Henry Ward Beecher
  • There is nothing in which the birds differ more from man than the way in which they can build and yet leave a landscape as it was before. ~ Robert Lynd
  • You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that! ~ Dave Barry
  • All of the animals except for man know that the principle business of life is to enjoy it. ~ Samuel Butler
  • A Horse! A Horse! My kingdom for a horse! ~ Shakespeare
  • A horse gallops with his lungs, perseveres with his heart and wins with his character. ~ Tesio
  • To err is human, to purr, feline. ~ Robert Byrne
  • To err is human, to forgive, canine. ~ Anonymous
  • Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives. ~ Sue Murphy
  • No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome me. ~ Anonymous
  • A dog maybe a man's best friend but a horse made history... ~ Anonymous
  • There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. ~ Ben Williams
  • I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contained. I stand and look at them long and long. ~ Walt Whitman
  • If having a soul means being able to feel love and loyalty and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans. ~ James Herriot
  • I love cats because I enjoy my home; and, little by little, they become its visible soul. ~ Jean Cocteau
  • A house is not a home without a pet. ~ Anonymous
  • In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat. ~ Warren Eckstein
  • Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. ~ Ann Landers
  • Dogs have owners; cats have staff. ~ Anonymous
  • A canter is the cure for all evil. ~ Benjamin Disraeli on horses
  • Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. ~ Joe Gores
  • Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened. ~ Anatole France
  • A dog is the only thing on earth that will love you more than you love yourself. ~ Josh Billings
  • You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us. ~ Robert Louis Stevenson
  • Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes! ~ Theophile Gautier
  • The purity of a person's heart can be quickly measured by how they regard animals. ~ Anonymous
  • We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals. ~ Immanual Kant
  • An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. ~ Martin Buber
  • If all the beasts were gone, men would die from a great loneliness of spirit, for whatever happens to the beasts also happens to the man. All things are connected. Whatever befalls the Earth befalls the sons of the Earth. ~ Chief Seattle of the Suquamish Tribe, letter to President Franklin Pierce
  • There is in all animals a sense of duty that man condescends to call instinct. ~ Robert Brault, robertbrault.com ~ Robert Brault
  • To insult someone we call him "bestial." For deliberate cruelty and nature, "human" might be the greater insult. ~ Isaac Asimov, Isaac Asimov's Book of Science and Nature Quotations, 1988
  • I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. ~ Winston Churchill
  • I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the "lower animals" (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me. ~ Mark Twain, Letters from the Earth, 1907
  • Be it human or animal, touch is a life-giving thing. Has anyone ever had a stroke or a heart attack while cozied up with a pet? I doubt it. ~ Robert Brault
  • I believe in animal rights, and high among them is the right to the gentle stroke of a human hand. ~ Robert Brault
  • Most pets display so many humanlike traits and emotions it's easy to forget they're not gifted with the English language and then get snubbed when we talk to them and they don't say anything back. ~ Stephenie Geist
  • Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet. ~ Colette
  • It often happens that a man is more humanely related to a cat or dog than to any human being. ~ Henry David Thoreau
  • Animals have these advantages over man: they never hear the clock strike, they die without any idea of death, they have no theologians to instruct them, their last moments are not disturbed by unwelcome and unpleasant ceremonies, their funerals cost them nothing, and no one starts lawsuits over their wills. ~ Voltaire, letter to Count Schomberg, 31 August 1769
  • The kind man feeds his beast before sitting down to dinner. ~ Hebrew Proverb
  • Lots of people talk to animals.... Not very many listen, though.... That's the problem. ~ Benjamin Hoff, The Tao of Pooh
  • Man is rated the highest animal, at least among all animals who returned the questionnaire. ~ Robert Brault
  • It is an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man - for precisely the same reasons. ~ Douglas Adams, The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy
  • An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. ~ Martin Buber
  • You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets. ~ Nora Ephron
  • Animals are such agreeable friends. They ask no questions; they pass no criticisms. ~ George Eliot
  • Ever consider what pets must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth! ~ Anne Tyler, The Accidental Tourist
  • No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation. - Fran Lebowitz
  • Cat Law of Selective Hearing "A cat can hear a mouse yawning a mile away, while filtering out the sound of a pleading human just six feet away. - Anonymous
  • Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this. ~ Anonymous
  • There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. ~ Wesley Bates
  • Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want. - Joseph Wood Krutch
  • A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution. ~ Hazel Nicholson
  • There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast. - Anonymous
  • You know your cat is getting old when she quits hunting in the back yard. Now she hunts at your dinner table.- Denny Lyon
  • Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry
  • My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet. ~ Edith Wharton
  • He doesn’t reckon his dog has human feelings, but he sure lets you know when you hurt his instincts. ~ Robert Brault
  • The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog. - Ambrose Bierce
  • Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. ~ Roger Caras
  • No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as a dog does. - Christopher Morley
  • If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. Harry S. Truman
  • A dog is not intelligent. Never trust an animal that's surprised by its own farts. - Frank Skinner
  • The more I see of men, the more I admire dogs. Jeanne-Marie Roland
  • Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone. Lenny Bruce
  • Women are like Elephants. I like to watch them, but I wouldn't want to own one. - W. C. Fields

Political Humor

  • A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. - Texas Guinan
  • He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. - George Bernard Shaw
  • "If we were a dog food, they would take us off the shelf." - Rep. Thomas M. Davis III (R-Va.), in a memo to colleagues about the problem with the Republican brand
  • "Now he tells us that he's the one who's gonna take on the old boys network. The old boys network? In the McCain campaign that's called a staff meeting. Come on!" - Barack Obama, about John McCain
  • "If he's the answer, then the question must be ridiculous." - New York Gov. David Patterson, on John McCain at his speech at the Democratic National Convention 2008
  • "I've been sleeping like a baby. Sleep two hours, wake up and cry, sleep two hours, wake up and cry.'' - John McCain, talking to Jay Leno about his election loss
  • "So?" —Vice President Dick Cheney, responding to an ABC News correspondent who cited a poll showing that most Americans do not believe the Iraq War was worth fighting, March 19, 2008
  • "So what?" –President Bush, responding to a an ABC News correspondent who pointed out that Al Qaeda wasn't a threat in Iraq until after the U.S. invaded, Dec. 14, 2008
  • "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter." –President George W. Bush, in parting words to British Prime Minister Gordon Brown and French President Nicolas Sarkozy at his final G-8 Summit, punching the air and grinning widely as the two leaders looked on in shock, Rusutsu, Japan, July 10, 2008 (Oh, this is funny on so many levels...)
  • "I don't want to be invited to the family hunting party." - Barack Obama, on revelations that he and Dick Cheney are eighth cousins (2007)
  • "You can always tell when the Republicans are getting restless, because the Vice President's motorcade pulls into the Capitol, and Darth Vader emerges." – Hillary Clinton about VP Cheney in 2007
  • "Thanks for the question, you little jerk." -- John McCain, after being asked by a high school student if he was too old to be president. For good measure, McCain then threatened to draft him. (2007)
  • "I've been asked if that nickname bothers me, and the answer is, no. After all, Darth Vader is one of the nicer things I've been called recently." - Dick Cheney (2007 – this guy thrives on negative attention)
  • "A year ago, my approval rating was in the 30s, my nominee for the Supreme Court had just withdrawn, and my Vice President had shot someone. Ahhh, those were the good old days." – George W. Bush, at the 2007 Radio-TV Correspondents' dinner

Holiday: Mother's Day

  • Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills: Dad's Third Wife Day. - Jay Leno, comedian, TV host
  • Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. - George Burns, American vaudeville and TV comedian