Dennys Funny Quotes: 01/01/2011

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 30 Jan 2011

Posts on astronomy, news, politics, poetry, lots of crazy humor, health and food.

From Denny: The past month I've been busy rounding up what the readers enjoyed throughout the year on all the blogs. It's amazing what people find intriguing - like the crazy humor post about the sloths over at Dennys Funny Quotes. The sloth post has gone past 30,000 views. People just love the cute little guys in the video. It's for a good cause too - a sloth sanctuary in Costa Rica.

Thanks, all of you, for visiting, commenting, subscribing in feeds and email updates! Your support is much appreciated!

Political Cartoons: Obama 2011 State Of The Union

How the cartoonists viewed the 2011 SOTU and cracked Republican responses.

President Barack Obama delivers the 2010 State...

Obama 2010 SOTU photo Image via Wikipedia

From Denny: Oh, the SOTU address. Doesn't it just bring shivers down your spine? OK, maybe not. But we do all wait for that time once a year to see if our politicians can behave like grown-ups for at least a night. Since the horrific shooting of Democrat Congresswoman Gabby Giffords in Tucson a few weeks ago, the watchword was to dial back the toxic rhetoric and dish out civil political discourse.

Well, this year was the time of acting like a bunch of middle school kids, asking each other to sit together in "mixed seating" instead of the usual partisan group seating by political party. No kidding. GOP Cantor asked Democrat Speaker Pelosi to sit with him. Of course, he was too popular and too cool to ask her directly. He did so through about three intermediaries. How childish can you get? Pelosi politely gave his staff the brush off as she had already asked her own Republican beau to the dance, uh, farce.

President Obama was barely into his speech when the GOP was up on Twitter denouncing it in the ugliest of tones and the usual spitballs flying all over the classroom, uh, the nation's Capitol. In the SOTU speech Obama seemed to hit the right notes with the American public as was evidenced by the polls. The real question is whether this president who is well known for inspirational speech-making will actually follow up with more than tepid deeds aimed at pleasing corporate welfare America. And my question is this: Will he ever look like a Democrat instead of a right-leaning GOP wannabe?

The 2011 State Of The Union address:

Funny Video: Jon Stewart Mocks Cranky Senator McCain

Cranky politicians make themselves useful as objects suitable for satire.

ST. PAUL, MN - SEPTEMBER 03: Host Jon Stewart...

Image by Getty Images via @daylife

From Denny: OK, what can I say? Poor Senator McCain is always good for a laugh as he has become such a caricature of himself these past couple of years. Kinda sad. Kinda funny. Jon Stewart sure thinks so. And right now I'm in the mood for one of my favorite crazy comics. :)

Daily Show: Let's All Stand on John McCain's Lawn
Puppet Senator John McCain attributes his crankiness to America not electing him president.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

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Let's All Stand on John McCain's Lawn

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Tags: John McCain, appearances, puppets, senior citizens, Robert Gibbs, resignations, Obama administration, White House, Republicans, Barack Obama, fashion, vacations, print media, gay/homosexual, military, troops, movies, photos, intro, Jimmy Wales, Wikipedia, Internet

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Popular Posts 2010 at Dennys Global Politics

Check out some stellar political cartoons chronicling social issues and politics throughout the year, news analysis and opinion.

From Denny: What a list of news that happened this year! Whew! Sometimes the news and politics were as toxic as the weather - and we all felt like we needed government issue gas masks. Take a look at some of the highlights:

Haiti earthquake
Volcanic eruptions in Iceland and Indonesia
BP Oil Spill Disaster in the Gulf of Mexico (my backyard in Louisiana)
Floods around the world
North Korea threatening to launch nukes
Finally getting the beginnings of a national health bill reform in America - which needs a lot of tinkering to perfect
Another woman appointed to the Supreme Court - not before the GOP humiliated her publicly and drug her through the mud for not being Christian enough - she's Jewish.
WikiLeaks documents released about the Afghan War
Unemployment high around the world like in America and the world economy floundering
Obama's popularity up and down, according to which fool he is listening to as the It Advisor Of The Moment.
The Republicans marching goose step as The Party of No Conscience, No Sense and Don't Care About the Middle Class

Popular Posts 2009 at Dennys Global Politics

See Cartoons by Cartoon by John Trever - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

New Years: Funny Quotes, Resolutions Tips, Poems

Poll: Most Admired People For 2010

Arrested WikiLeaks Founder Signs Tell All $1.3 Million Book Deal

Funny Life and Christmas Cartoons - 25 Dec 2010

GOP Grinch Refuse Healthcare to 911 Responders, Dems Say YES to Pass Bill

72 Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 20 Dec 2010

What Is The Truth About Unemployment In America?

Gordon Brown Book: 9 Big Banks Manipulating World Economy - Check out the crooked world of global banking.

WikiLeaks, Obama Tax Cuts, Political Humor - 12 Dec 2010 - More Santa and WikiLeaks cartoons for fun.

Sellout Obama and Bush Tax Cuts Firestorm Angers America

World Politics: Funny WikiLeaks Cartoons

Political Cartoons: American and World Politics - 4 Dec 2010

Obama Presidency: Dead On Arrival in 2012?

North Korea Throws Dangerous Temper Tantrum: Why?

American and World Politics Cartoons - 27 Nov 2010 - Lots to lampoon this week for cartoonists as they poke fun at crazy North Korea, the buffoon of the world.

American and World Politics Humor - 20 Nov 2010 - Check out the national mind and the national conversation about politics and American culture this week from our favorite cartoonists.

TSA Pat Downs: PC Sexual Assault? - Furor over invasive sexual airport security measures has thousands across the country furious at the groping.

Funny Thanksgiving Quotes, Video, Cartoons and Food Posts

Funny Thanksgiving Presidential Pardon 4 Turkeys Apple and Cider

Taiwans Whale-Sized Skimmer to Gulf Coast Rescue, Obama Ranked High as 15th Prez - News Headlines 2 July 2010 - Behemoth sized skimmer ship created just for oil spill clean up is impressive. Check out Obama's rankings compared to past presidents.

American and World Politics Cartoons - 3 July 2010 - Check out the latest suspects this week in the world of politics who qualify for the Bozo Sapien Award!

Kagan Takes Hits From GOP For Not Being Christian Enough - News Headlines 1 July 2010 - Greed Over Principle Republicans scorn Elena Kagan for being a Jew at Supreme Court nominee hearings.

Posts Roundup at Dennys 14 Blogs - 4 July 2010 - Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.

Posts Roundup of Dennys 14 Blogs - 27 June 2010

Obamas Oval Office Speech, CEO Weigh in on Obama, Reality of BPs $20 Billion Escrow - News Headlines 16 June 2010 - Hold on to your hats getting happy about this $20 billion from BP. They have some tricks up their sleeves to avoid paying it out in a timely fashion.

Spies Among Us, Scumbag Congress Denies Food to Children of Unemployed - News Headlines 29 June 2010 - Spies play games in America and scumbag Congress denies extension of unemployment benefits to desperate jobless in America.

Why Not to Nuke the Oil Spill, Israels International Mess - News Headlines 2 June 2010 - Read why not to nuke the Gulf oil spill and the many sides of the Israeli raid issue.

Obamas Oval Office Speech, CEO Weigh in on Obama, Reality of BPs $20 Billion Escrow - News Headlines 16 June 2010

American and World Politics Cartoons - 12 June 2010 - And this crazy world goes round and round from politics. Check out the world cup soccer cartoons!

Krewe of Dead Pelicans BP Protest Parade, Oil Spill Stories - News Headlines 8 June 2010

World Idiots: Israel Gaza Raid Mess, North Korea Cartoons - 5 June 2010

BP On Hook for $75 Billion in Claims, 1-Man Mission American Ninja Faulkner Hunts bin Laden, News Headlines 15 June 2010 - New Federal Reserve rules to protect consumers on credit cards, new larger estimate for oil gushing in the Gulf, Bloody Sunday apology from Britain PM

BP Nightmare Well, Congress Ready to Nail BP, Kennedy FBI Docs, Obama Gets Oil Spill Help - News Headlines 14 June 2010 - Assassination attempts on Ted Kennedy recorded by the FBI. Congress gets ready to nail BP to the wall this week in hearings. Get a front row seat as it will be rich political theatre.

10 Funny Posts For a Laugh - 23 June 2010

See Cartoons by Cartoon by Jimmy Margulies - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

Woman Chosen 4 Supreme Court, BP Sprays Chemicals into Oil Spill, Obscene Exec Perks - News Headlines 10 May 2010

BP Found Cheating, Auto Dealers Sleazing Public, Voters Oust Porkers, Haiti Charities Stingy - News Headlines 12 May 2010

Sticking It to Iran, Obama and Jobs Creation, Survey Goes Against New Oil Drilling - News Headlines 18 May 2010

American and World Politics Cartoons - 29 May 2010 - Check out funny political opinion from the national cartoonists and what they think about American and world politics.

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 30 May 2010

American and World Politics Cartoons - 29 May 2010

Russians Say Nuke BP Oil Spill, Hordes Leaving Facebook, Big Business Cheats, Obamas Tax Reform - News Headlines 13 May 2010

Supreme Court Pick Hunt, Dems Whimp Out on Finanacial Fund 4 Reform, How You Get on No-Fly List, Obama Tough on Airlines - News Headlines 5 May 2010

See Cartoons by Cartoon by Jimmy Margulies - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

See Cartoons by Cartoon by Eric Allie - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

Greek Debt Crisis 4 The World: Political Cartoons 8 May 2010

Russians Say Nuke BP Oil Spill, Hordes Leaving Facebook, Big Business Cheats, Obamas Tax Reform - News Headlines 13 May 2010

America Not Ready 4 Cyberattacks, Pelosi Death Threats, Iraq Violence, Kyrgyzstan Riots, Skinhead Leaves Hate Behind - News Headlines 7 Apr 2010

Goldman Sh--ty Deal Testifies Loud and Clear, Drug Company Pays $500 Billion Fine, How to Detect Liars - News Headlines 27 Apr 2010

BP Oil Spill Gulf Coast Disaster, Employers New Tactics to Fire Employees, Travel Smarter, New PTSD Treatment - News Headlines 30 Apr 2010

America Boycotts Arizona, BP Oil Spill Impacts Wildlife, Enraged Wall Street Protestors, Strange News Stories - News Headlines 29 Apr 2010

Greedy Opportunistic Wall Street: Political Cartoons, Opinion Post - 24 April 2010

BP Oil Spill Gulf Coast Disaster, Employers New Tactics to Fire Employees, Travel Smarter, New PTSD Treatment - News Headlines 30 Apr 2010

Cool Earth Day Links, Message From Our Prez

Prez Clinton Versus Violent Wingnuts and Blowhard Limbaugh

Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs - 18 Apr 2010

Obamas Nuke Policy, China Hacks India, Britain Votes, Net Neutrality, Guilt Study, News Headlines 6 Apr 2010

Voters Moon American Politics Polls Say, Bush Years Bad Air Report Released, Throwing Eggs at Ukrainian Politicians - News Headlines 28 Apr 2010

Scumbag Walmart Lawsuit Caught, Scumbag Goldman Sachs Email Guilty, Scumbag GOP Denies Scumbag Reform - News Headlines 26 Apr 2010

Icelands 2nd Volcano, Haiti Food Stops, Wayward Nukes Seized, Freaky Unschooling, Earth Day - News Headlines 21 Apr 2010

See Cartoons by Cartoon by Mike Keefe - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

Poison Politics Meet Domestic Terrorists, Volcano Axes Economies, Wall Street War, Octupus Thief - News Headlines 20 Apr 2010

Prez Clinton Interviews, Slamming Wall Street, Tea Party Spat With Fox, Volcano Effect - News Headlines 19 Apr 2010

Breakdown of Who Are Tea Party Members, Bizarre Karzai, Obama Picks New Justice Soon, Immunity for Pope - News Headlines 5 Apr 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 30 May 2010

Child Porn Social Site Busted - News Headlines 27 May 2010 - International child pedophile ring acting as a sicko social site arrested.

Use NASA 4 Oil Spill Help, Corrupt MMS, Lightning Rod Rahm Emanuel - News Headlines 26 May 2010

Political Cartoons: Local and World Economy - 22 May 2010

Airport Scanners Safety Questioned, Iran Skirts Nuke Sanctions, Sex Criminals Indefinitely Detained - News Headlines 17 May 2010

Actor Kevin Costner Pitches Solution to BP Headache, Intelligence Head Resigns, Why Kagan Elitist Good - News Headlines 20 May 2010

Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs - 16 May 2010

See Cartoons by Cartoon by John Cole - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

Hedge Fund Short Selling Caused Market Dive, Cameron New Brit PM, Govt Changes Approach to Oil Oversight - News Headlines 11 May 2010

Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs 9 May 2010

Pakistan Trained Bomber, Obamas Workaholic Ways, Catholics Polled About Sex Abuse - News Headlines 4 May 2010

BP Oil Spill Coverage - News Headlines 3 May 2010

Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs 2 May 2010

Roundup of Political Cartoons This Weeks Funny Opinion 1 May 2010

Posts Roundup This Week at Dennys Blogs 25 Apr 2010

Whats Happening in America This Week - Political Cartoons 17 Apr 2010

Clinton Addresses Wingnuts, Wall Street Cries Foul, Radioactive Obama Nominee, Airplanes and Volcanos - News Headlines 16 Apr 2010

Icelands Volcano Stops Air Traffic, Poland Grieves, Utah Earthquake, Obama OKs Gay Hospital Visits, Healthy Chocolate - News Headlines 15 Apr 2010

See Cartoons by Cartoon by Petar Pismestrovic - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

Both Obamas Charm the World, Vatican Squirms, Wall Street Howls Against Reform, Tibet Earthquake - News Headlines 14 Apr 2010

Iran Scientist Defects to America, Obama Issues Sanctions - News Headlines 30 Mar 2010

Hate Groups On the Rampage, Big Banks Skirting the Law - Headlines 29 Mar 2010

Weekly Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 28 Mar 2010

51 Funny Political Cartoons - Sex Scandals, Rove, Obama, Health Care, Tea Party - 27 Mar 2010

How New Health Law Affects You, Comics Review The News, Tea Party Antics - Headlines 26 Mar 2010

Health Bill Bounces Back to House for Final Push - Headlines 25 Mar 2010

Sweeping Health Care Reform Signed into Law Today, Headlines 23 Mar 2010

41 Post Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 22 Mar 2010

Health Care Reform Resistance, Funny Political Cartoons - 20 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 16 Mar 2010 - Religious Sex Scandals, Scientology Abuses, Lost Shakespeare Found

More Hideous Molestation Sex Scandals - Headlines 24 Mar 2010

Health Care Vote and What You Get, Iraq War Anniversary - News Roundup 21 Mar 2010

Latest on Health Care Bill - Headlines Roundup 19 Mar 2010

Fleecing America: Political Hypocrites Drenched in Stimulus Money

See Cartoons by Cartoon by John Darkow - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

Senate Parliamentarian Rules Against GOP to Stop Passed Health Care

Cartoonists Cajun Whoop A$$ on Everyone - 40 Funny Political Cartoons - 13 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 10 Mar 2010 - Rep. Patrick Kennedy righteous outburst in House

44 Funny Political Cartoon Strike Outs: Bunning, Health Care, Chile, Toyota

Hissy Fit Over Controversial Armenian Genocide Vote

Update: Republican Senator Flips Off Middle Finger to Families: Takes Food Off Kids Plates

48 Post Roundup: Dennys Blogs 7 Mar 2010

Iran Scientist Defects to America, Obama Issues Sanctions - News Headlines 30 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 15 Mar 2010 - CEO Bonuses, Life in Antarctica, Old Europe

More Hideous Molestation Sex Scandals - Headlines 24 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 16 Mar 2010

News Headlines Roundup 15 Mar 2010

29 Post Roundup at Dennys Blogs 14 Mar 2010

Speaker Pelosi Grades the Republicans on Lack of Governing

8.8 Chilean Earthquake 500 Times More Powerful than Haiti

Funny Political Cartoons: Political Olympics, Broken Government, Lampooning Toyota - 27 Feb 2010

Toyota Owner Testifies to Congress, Toyota Prez Pretends Apology, Still No Fixes

Republicans Smash Health Care Summit, Snub Prez Obama

Funny Colbert Interviews Erickson, Head of Conservative RedState.com

42 Funny Cartoons: Olympics, Obama, Obstructionists, Obesity and You - 20 Feb 2010

Tepid Blowback of Hamas Leader Assassination

Funny Mardi Gras Quotes, Who Dat Rocking Saints Songs

Funny Faceoff with VPs Biden and Valdamort Cheney

How Wall Street Killed the Middle Class in America

See Cartoons by Cartoon by John Trever - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

Obama Fires Back at Republican Unruly Opposition

American Public Angry at Prez Obamas 1st Year in Office

Political Showdown: Obama in Face-Off with House Republicans

Prez Obamas 1st State of the Union Speech Text and Video

Student Documentary Filmakers Rolled Cameras in Haiti Moments After Earthquake

Doctors Without Borders Work Without Meds, Logistics of Ferrying Supplies into Haiti

67 Charities to Donate: Helping Haiti Heal

Haiti: Before and After Quake Photos

Haiti Flattened by 7.0 Earthquake, Awaiting Rescue, Charity Worker Cousin Survived

Funny Editorial Cartoons 9 Jan 2010

Obama Fires Back at Republican Unruly Opposition

Editorial Cartoons 2 Jan 2010

How Funny! 10 Banned Overused Buzzwords of 2009

Fun Cartoon Review: Happy New Year!

Popular Posts 2009 at Dennys Global Politics

*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:
The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Dennys Art Sanctuary
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor
Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious And Odd - more crazy humor
Romancing The Chocolate
Comfort Food From Louisiana
Unusual 2 Tasty
Dennys Blog Feeds - what is posting on all the blogs to view at a glance

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Funny Video: SNL Skit Lampoons Speakers Pelosi and Boehner

Get a grin at the comedy routine of competing House Speakers from both sides of the political aisle. The tough guy GOP Speaker is reduced to tears - by a savvy woman.

From Denny: Talk about entertaining. In this SNL comedy skit the fake Speaker Pelosi gets back at Speaker Boehner for reducing her gavel down to a teeny weeny pink gavel while he sports a huge honking outsized sledgehammer gavel. She keeps mentioning various situations she knows will make Boehner start his weeping jags for which he is so famously known.

The complete post, full of funny trivia about the American political gavels in the Senate and the House chambers, is parked over at The Social Poets:

Funny News: Check Out That Huge Honking Political Gavel

SNL Skit: Nancy Pelosi Demonstrates What Makes John Boehner Cry

Comic Kristen Wiig played Speaker Nancy Pelosi. Bill Hader played Speaker Jon Boehner, pretending to be guests on Weekend Update on Saturday Night Live. The skit goes that Nancy presents John with the Speaker's gavel, you know the outgoing Speaker gives over the political symbol of the gavel to the incoming Speaker.

Of course, the fake Boehner decides he will reciprocate a gavel to now Minority Speaker Pelosi, so he gifts her with a teeny, tiny girly pink gavel. Of course, not to be outdone on that one, Nancy makes a decision of her own: She gives John Boehner something to really cry about since weeping is for what he is so famously known. They don't call her Competition Nancy for no reason. Tiny gavel but Big Mind. I want her on my team!

The complete post, full of funny trivia about the American political gavels in the Senate and the House chambers, is parked over at The Social Poets:

Funny News: Check Out That Huge Honking Political Gavel

Photo of Speakers Pelosi and Boehner by Charles Dharapak from AP images

*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

*** Check out Holiday Recipes From Dennys Food and Recipes

The Social Poets - news, politics, political cartoon humor
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Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
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Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
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Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Monday, January 17, 2011

39 Funny Satire Cartoons - 17 Jan 2011

Cartoons that will keep you laughing for a life time as you see yourself - or your neighbor - from a laughable angle.

From Denny: Flying in for a landing this Monday are some hilarious cartoons about every stage of our lives from being a child observing our parents' odd doings to those cranky weird old people in the neighborhood cartoons. Get a fresh perspective - and a good laugh - after your work day here!

How to keep yourself entertained in your retirement years - "Deliver me!"

Most Popular Posts 2010 at The Soul Calendar

Check out the popular science stories this year that fascinated us like the volcanic explosions and earthquakes.

From Denny: Thanks for all your support this year! What a year of massive planet wide geologic changes: polar glacial ice caps melting rapidly, high scale earthquakes in Haiti, Chile and around the world, volcanoes spewing lava high into the air in Iceland and Indonesia - stopping air travel. It's been a humbling year for the human race on planet Earth. Floods, blizzards, mudslides, oceans rising, the Earth is changing and we are here to witness it.

Just this December we got to see the first lunar eclipse on a Winter Solstice, the first in almost 500 years. The next one is scheduled for 2094. Here in my region of the world we experienced the British Petroleum Oil Spill Disaster. As usual Big Business and the governments like America and Britain have shafted the locals who have gone bankrupt, personal and business. The millions of barrels of oil still lurks on the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico and continues to wash ashore. There are now light orange alligators found off the coast of Florida.

Here in Louisiana BP's oil spill devastated our fishing industry, killing the oyster beds and safe fishing grounds for everything from shrimp and spillway crawfish to salt water fish. The fishing industry has declined by 70 percent with no help from BP or our federal government. Big Business is just plain greedy and refuses to take care of the planet and future generations.

Out of this oil spill disaster has come some interesting ideas of how to clean up future oil spills. More ideas abound for new types of alternative fuels using the ocean to help produce it. Humanity can be innovative and creative if we just curb our greed to use our resources faster than we can replace them.

Take a look around. There are plenty of humor posts too and lots of technology cartoons for a grin.

The Soul Calendar - Wondering about our universe and the universe inside us.

Check out these posts too: Most Popular Posts 2009 at The Soul Calendar

Here's the most popular posts for 2010:

Rare 500 Year Lunar Eclipse Gets Viewed By 1.5 Billion

Popular Funny X-ray Pin-Ups Calendar: Stripped to the Bone

New Years: Funny Quotes, Resolutions Tips, Poems

28 Awesome Desktop Calendar Wallpapers

Check out the most interesting offerings from some great designers this year.

From Denny: Smashing Magazine has put out some real beauties for the "calendar challenged" where I culled out the most interesting and beautiful choices. Why print up a calendar when you can display it on your monitor? Check out just a few of these beauties.

They come in several monitor resolution sizes - and without the calendar - if you just enjoy the photo. You can even vote for your favorites on the site - which I did. I figure if someone took the time to create, send, choose, upload and post them then I can vote for the ones I enjoyed the most. :)

The designers hail from countries all over the world: America, Spain, The Netherlands, Myanmar, India, Nepal, Italy, Portugal, Russia, Poland, Romania, Moldova, England. Be sure to check out their links as most have links and are some interesting design, illustration, flickr or photography sites. Enjoy - and be sure to let me know your favorites! :)

*** All of these delightful designs can be found in five resolution sizes, with or without the calendar, at Smashing Magazine: Desktop Wallpaper Calendar January 2011.

Celebrating 2011

Designed by Tim Fritz from USA.

Frost Bitten - "A collaboration between two sisters. One’s a photographer and the other is a designer." Designed by Denise Johnson and Sharleen Heist from USA.

Quiet Please - Designed by Diana Samoila from Romania.

*** All of these delightful designs can be found in five resolution sizes, with or without the calendar, at Smashing Magazine: Desktop Wallpaper Calendar January 2011.

Funny Videos: Dancing Penguins

Get a grin at a real dancing penguin that was on the news and another animated hip song version.

dancing penguin Pictures, Images and Photos

From Denny: This news video went viral on 29 Dec 2010 of a real penguin doing his own Happy Dance in the land of ice and snow:

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

An animated version:

Monday, January 3, 2011

Funny Videos: Happy New Year From Cartoonists

Check out the cartoonists funny idea of wishing us a Happy New Year.

From Denny: Hope you are enjoying the New Year of 2011! These funny cartoonists get us going with the laughter. After such a tough year in 2010 with all the political squabbling and harsh weather events we all could use a little down time to smile more. Enjoy!

This year's New Year's Eve in Times Square, New York City, to welcome 2011:

*** Check out these posts too:

Funny Video: Happy New Year, Cartoonist Review of 2010 - Get a New Year grin at the cartoonist review of our last political year.

Video: Happy New Year 2011 Animated Dancing Penguins - Enjoy an amusing New Year wish from the animated corner of the world. New York Times Square 2011 New Year video too.

Fun Videos: Cartoonists Wish Us Happy New Year - Have a bit of fun watching the famous New York Times Square Waterford crystal ball talk out loud, wishing you a Happy New Year in perfect New York accent.

Best New Years Cartoons 2010

New Years: Funny Quotes, Resolutions Tips, Poems

New Year Celebrations: History And Trivia

*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

*** Check out Holiday Recipes From Dennys Food and Recipes

The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Best Spiritual Posts
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Genius

A genius is one who can do anything except make a living. - Joey Lauren Adams
A genius is one who shoots at something no one else can see - and hits it. - Anonymous
A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters
A harmless hilarity and a buoyant cheerfulness are not infrequent concomitants of genius; and we are never more deceived than when we mistake gravity for greatness, solemnity for science, and pomposity for erudition. - Charles Caleb Colton
Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage - to move in the opposite direction. - E.F. Schumacker
Character is higher than intellect. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Coffee is good for talent, but genius wants prayer. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius. - George Bernard Shaw
Common sense is not so common. - Voltaire
Every man is a potential genius - until he does something. - Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree
Every man of genius is considerably helped by being dead. - Robert S. Lynd
Every person of genius is considerably helped by being dead. - Robert S. Lun
Every true genius is bound to be naive. - J.C.F. von Schiller
Everyone is a genius at least once a year. The real geniuses simply have their bright ideas closer together. - Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense. - Josh Billings
Genius is an African who dreams up snow. - Vladimir Nabokov
Genius is more often found in a cracked pot than in a whole one. - E.B. White
Genius is nothing but a great aptitude for patience. - George-Louis de Buffon
Genius lasts longer than Beauty. That accounts for the fact that we all take such pains to over-educate ourselves. - Oscar Wilde
Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The trouble-makers. The round heads in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status-quo. You can quote them. Disagree with them. Glorify, or vilify them. But the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do. - Apple Computer
His genius he was quite content in one brief sentence to define; Of inspiration one percent, of perspiration, ninety nine. - Thomas A. Edison
I am convinced all of humanity is born with more gifts than we know. Most are born geniuses and just get de-geniused rapidly. - Buckminster Fuller
I can't tell you if genius is hereditary, because heaven has granted me no offspring. - James McNeill Whistler
I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up. - Mark Twain, "The Innocents Abroad"
I think the world is run by C students. - Al McGuire
I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered together at the White House, with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone. - John F. Kennedy, in an address to Nobel Prize winners
I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde. - Dolly Parton
If children grew up according to early indications, we should have nothing but geniuses. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
If the Aborigine drafted an I.Q. test, all of Western civilization would presumably flunk it. - Stanley Garn
If the human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we couldn't. - Emerson M. Pugh
In every work of genius, we recognize our own rejected thoughts; they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty. - Ralph Waldo Emerson, "Self Reliance," Essays, 1841
Mad, adj.: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence. - Ambrose Bierce
Man becomes man only by his intelligence, but he is man only by his heart. - Henri Frederic Amiel
Men of genius are meteors destined to burn themselves out in lighting up their age. - Napoleon Bonaparte, Discours de Lyon, 1771
Passion holds up the bottom of the universe and genius paints up its roof. - Chao Chang
Perhaps imagination is only intelligence having fun. - George Scialabra
Primitive does not mean stupid. - Anonymous
Since when was genius found respectable? - Elizabeth Barrett Browning
Some people take more care to hide their wisdom than their folly. - Jonathan Swift, Thoughts on Various Subjects, 1711
Sometimes, indeed, there is such a discrepancy between the genius and his human qualities that one has to ask oneself whether a little less talent might not have been better. - Carl Jung
Talent is that which is in a man's power; genius is that in whose power a man is. - James Russell Lowell, Literary Essays
The course of every intellectual, if he pursues his journey long and unflinchingly enough, ends in the obvious, from which the non-intellectuals have never stirred. - Aldous Huxley
The difference between intelligence and education is this: intelligence will make you a good living. - Charles F. Kettering
The invention of IQ does a great disservice to creativity in education. - Joel Hildebrand
The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius. - Oscar Wilde
The reluctance to put away childish things may be a requirement of genius. - Rebecca Pepper Sinkler
There is nobody so irritating as somebody with less intelligence and more sense than we have. - Don Herold
This is the nature of genius, to be able to grasp the knowable even when no one else recognizes that it is present. - Deepak Chopra
Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others. - Mark Twain
We know that the nature of genius is to provide idiots with ideas twenty years later. - Louis Aragon
We should not only use the brains we have, but all that we can borrow. - President Woodrow Wilson
We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality. - Albert Einstein
What a distressing contrast there is between the radiant intelligence of the child and the feeble mentality of the average adult. - Sigmund Freud
When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. - Jonathan Swift

Advice

Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself. - Cicero
A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice. - Edgar Watson Howe, Country Town Sayings, 1911
I always pass on good advice. It's the only thing to do with it. It is never any use to oneself. - Oscar Wilde, An Ideal Husband, 1895
Sometimes I give myself admirable advice, but I am incapable of taking it. - Mary Wortley Montagu
I never had a man come to me for advice yet, but what I soon discovered that he thought more of his own opinion than he did of mine. - Josh Billings
No one wants advice - only corroboration. - John Steinbeck, The Winter of Our Discontent
It is more easy to be wise for others than for ourselves. - François Duc de La Rochefoucauld
We hate to have some people give us advice because we know how badly they need it themselves. - Anonymous
The best way to succeed in life is to act on the advice we give to others. - Anonymous
When we ask advice we are usually looking for an accomplice. - Charles Varlet de La Grange, Pensées, 1872
Old men are fond of giving good advice, to console themselves for being no longer in a position to give bad examples. - François La Rochefoucauld
The best advice is this: Don't take advice and don't give advice. - Anonymous
When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants, and I give it to him. - Henry Wheeler Shaw, a.k.a. Josh Billings
Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it. - Gordon R. Dickson
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't. - Erica Jong, How to Save Your Own Life, 1977

Children

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff
Children are contemptuous, haughty, irritable, envious, sneaky, selfish, lazy, flighty, timid, liars and hypocrites, quick to laugh and cry, extreme in expressing joy and sorrow, especially about trifles, they'll do anything to avoid pain but they enjoy inflicting it: little men already. - Jean de La Bruyère, Les Caractères, 1688
The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old. - Joan Kerr, Please Don't Eat the Daisies, 1957
If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers. - Edgar W. Howe
There's nothing that can help you understand your beliefs more than trying to explain them to an inquisitive child. - Frank A. Clark
Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime. - Red Skelton
Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed. - Robert Gallagher
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller
Children's talent to endure stems from their ignorance of alternatives. - Maya Angelou, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, 1969
Women gather together to wear silly hats, eat dainty food, and forget how unresponsive their husbands are. Men gather to talk sports, eat heavy food, and forget how demanding their wives are. Only where children gather is there any real chance of fun. - Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
Children find everything in nothing; men find nothing in everything. - Giacomo Leopardi, Zibaldone Scelto
Do your kids a favor - don't have any. - Robert Orben
There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and his mother's age. - Benjamin Spock, Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care, 1945
A child seldom needs a good talking to as a good listening to. - Robert Brault
It is not easy to be crafty and winsome at the same time, and few accomplish it after the age of six. - John W. Gardner and Francesca Gardner Reese
What is a home without children? Quiet. - Henny Youngman
While we try to teach our children all about life, Our children teach us what life is all about. - Angela Schwindt
Little girls are cute and small only to adults. To one another they are not cute. They are life-sized. - Margaret Atwood
The prime purpose of being four is to enjoy being four - of secondary importance is to prepare for being five. - Jim Trelease, The Read-Aloud Handbook, 1985
In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley
A child is a curly dimpled lunatic. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
A little girl is sugar and spice and everything nice - especially when she's taking a nap. - Anonymous
Children seldom misquote. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said. - Anonymous (maybe Art Linkletter?)
There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Like fruit, children are sweetest just before they turn bad. - Dena Groquet
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - George Bernard Shaw
Boy, n.: a noise with dirt on it. - Not Your Average Dictionary
Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next. - Franklin P. Jones
In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children. The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted. The result is unruly children and childish adults. - Thomas Szasz
You are worried about seeing him spend his early years in doing nothing. What! Is it nothing to be happy? Nothing to skip, play, and run around all day long? Never in his life will he be so busy again. - Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Emile, 1762
Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man. - Rabindranath Tagore
Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky. - Fran Lebowitz
Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. - John W. Whitehead, The Stealing of America, 1983
Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford
A child can ask questions that a wise man cannot answer. - Anonymous
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley
A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn't act that way very often. - Anonymous
You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. - Franklin P. Jones
We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. - Stacia Tauscher

About Humor

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Anonymous
I think the next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it. - Frank Howard Clark
I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humor. - Edward Albee
Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully. - Max Eastman
Humor is the affectionate communication of insight. - Leo Rosten
Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth. - Citor Borge
Humor is richly rewarding to the person who employs it. It has some value in gaining and holding attention, but it has no persuasive value at all. - John Kenneth Galbraith
A sense of humor... is needed armor. Joy in one's heart and some laughter on one's lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life. - Hugh Sidey
A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor, for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself. - Jessammyn West
A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of life. - William A. Ward
Comedy has to be based on truth. You take the truth and you put a little curlicue at the end. - Sid Caesar
Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing. - William James
Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven. - Mark Twain
Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding. - Agnes Repplier
Humor is just another defense against the universe. - Mel Brooks
Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn. - Irvin S. Cobb
Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs. - Christopher Morley
Humor is reason gone mad. - Groucho Marx
A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke - and that the joke is oneself. - Clifton Paul Fadiman
A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles. - Mignon McLaughlin
A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road. - Henry Ward Beecher
A joke is a very serious thing. - Winston Churchill

Birthday Quotes

Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. - Tom Wilson
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. - Jennifer Yane
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. - Larry Lorenzoni
May you live to be a hundred years - With one extra year to repent.
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. - Lucille Ball
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. - Jean Paul Richter
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now.
You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience.
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. - George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Youth is a disease from which we all recover. - Dorothy Fulheim
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. - Branch Rickey
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. - Bob Hope
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. - Truman Capote
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. - Dan Bennett
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. - Charles Schulz
They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body.
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. - Mark Twain
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. - Jerry M. Wright
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - George Bernard Shaw
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. - Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip.
There is still no cure for the common birthday. - John Glenn
Birthdays are like girlfriends, they come and go-unless you enjoy them.
Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional. - Chili Davis
To me, old age is always 20 years older than I am.
You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.
Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet.
Looking fifty is great - if you’re sixty.
I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
After 30, a body has a mind of its own.
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can’t speak for my twin sister.
When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
Live as long as you may. The first twenty years are the longest half of your life.
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m five I’ll be 64.
Thirty five is a very attractive age; London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty-five for years.
Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.
About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.

Relationships

Great men are rarely isolated mountain peaks; they are the summits of ranges. - Thomas W. Higginson
I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox. - Woody Allen
In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. - Texas Guinan
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. - George Bernard Shaw
Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one? - Abraham Lincoln
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry
The more I see of men, the more I admire dogs. - Jeanne-Marie Roland
Women are like Elephants. I like to watch them, but I wouldn't want to own one. - W. C. Fields
When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler
Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone. - Lenny Bruce
Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship. - Oscar Wilde
Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use a words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid that area altogether. Trust me - Tim Allen
Cosmetics is a boon to every woman, but a girl's best friend is still a nearsighted man. - Yoko Ono
Twitter was invented by men. A woman would have chosen a higher character limit.
I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. - Bill Cosby
If you must have motivation, think of your paycheck on Friday. - Noel Coward
True love is like a pair of socks: you gotta have two and they've gotta match. – Groucho Marx
I don't have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks. - Groucho Marx
Ugly visual: When you're up to your nose in sh*t, keep your mouth shut. - Anonymous
If it weren't for women, men would still be wearing last week's socks. - Cynthia Nelms
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy. - Steven Wright
I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose. - Woody Allen
Love lasteth as long as the money endureth. - William Caxton
The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post. - George Bernard Shaw
Love is like the measles; we all have to go through it. - Jerome K. Jerome
True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. - Erich Segal
Sometimes I lie awake at night, & I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than 1 night." - Anonymous
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? – (understandably) Anonymous
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. - Henny Youngman
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet. - Mae West (wink wink)
In life; it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out! - Joey Adams

Make You Wanna Wince: Dumbisms

If it weren't for the last minute, a lot of things wouldn't get done. - Michael S. Traylor
I stand by all the misstatements that I've made. - Dan Quayle
The loss of life will be irreplaceable. - Dan Quayle
Not only is he ambidextrous, but he can throw with either hand. - Duffy Daugherty, football coach and sports analyst, a word smith he isn't
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. – (understandably) Anonymous, probably from a stoned rocker after a concert
If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. - Brooke Shields
We are ready for an unforseen event that may or may not occur. - Dan Quayle, VP to Bush 41
If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure. - Dan Quayle
We are sorry to announce that Mr. Albert Brown has been quite unwell, owing to his recent death, and is taking a short holiday to recover. - Parish Magazine
Please provide the date of your death. - from an IRS letter
I have opinions of my own - strong opinions - but I don't always agree with them. – President George W. Bush (Bush 43)

Pet Quotes: Funny & Serious

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbet
I always like a dog so long as he isn't spelled backward. - G. K. Chesterton
Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate. - Sigmund Freud
Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. - Roger Caras
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Anne Landers
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain
Heaven goes by favor; if it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain
A dog is not considered a good dog because he is a good barker. A man is not considered a good man because he is a good talker. - Buddha
I've met many thinkers and many cats, but the wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. ~ Hippolyte Taine
A dog has lots of friends because he wags his tail and not his tongue. ~ Anonymous
The dog represents all that is best in man. ~ Etienne Charlet
Love the animals: God has given them the rudiments of thought and joy untroubled. ~ Fyodor Dostoyevsky
Every boy should have two things: a dog, and a mother willing to let him have one. ~ Anonymous
And God took a handful of Southerly wind, blew His breath over it and created the horse. ~ Bedouin Legend
The bird of paradise alights only upon the hand that does not grasp. ~ John Berry
A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg. ~ Samuel Butler
If I have any beliefs about immortality it is that certain dogs I know will go to heaven, and very – very - few people. ~ James Thurber
The Cat. He walked by himself, and all places were alike to him. ~ Rudyard Kipling
The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated. ~ Mahatma Gandhi
The dog was created especially for children. He is the God of frolic. ~ Henry Ward Beecher
There is nothing in which the birds differ more from man than the way in which they can build and yet leave a landscape as it was before. ~ Robert Lynd
You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that! ~ Dave Barry
All of the animals except for man know that the principle business of life is to enjoy it. ~ Samuel Butler
A Horse! A Horse! My kingdom for a horse! ~ Shakespeare
A horse gallops with his lungs, perseveres with his heart and wins with his character. ~ Tesio
To err is human, to purr, feline. ~ Robert Byrne
To err is human, to forgive, canine. ~ Anonymous
Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives. ~ Sue Murphy
No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome me. ~ Anonymous
A dog maybe a man's best friend but a horse made history... ~ Anonymous
There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. ~ Ben Williams
I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contained. I stand and look at them long and long. ~ Walt Whitman
If having a soul means being able to feel love and loyalty and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans. ~ James Herriot
I love cats because I enjoy my home; and, little by little, they become its visible soul. ~ Jean Cocteau
A house is not a home without a pet. ~ Anonymous
In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat. ~ Warren Eckstein
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. ~ Ann Landers
Dogs have owners; cats have staff. ~ Anonymous
A canter is the cure for all evil. ~ Benjamin Disraeli on horses
Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. ~ Joe Gores
Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened. ~ Anatole France
A dog is the only thing on earth that will love you more than you love yourself. ~ Josh Billings
You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us. ~ Robert Louis Stevenson
Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes! ~ Theophile Gautier
The purity of a person's heart can be quickly measured by how they regard animals. ~ Anonymous
We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals. ~ Immanual Kant
An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. ~ Martin Buber
If all the beasts were gone, men would die from a great loneliness of spirit, for whatever happens to the beasts also happens to the man. All things are connected. Whatever befalls the Earth befalls the sons of the Earth. ~ Chief Seattle of the Suquamish Tribe, letter to President Franklin Pierce
There is in all animals a sense of duty that man condescends to call instinct. ~ Robert Brault, robertbrault.com ~ Robert Brault
To insult someone we call him "bestial." For deliberate cruelty and nature, "human" might be the greater insult. ~ Isaac Asimov, Isaac Asimov's Book of Science and Nature Quotations, 1988
I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. ~ Winston Churchill
I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the "lower animals" (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me. ~ Mark Twain, Letters from the Earth, 1907
Be it human or animal, touch is a life-giving thing. Has anyone ever had a stroke or a heart attack while cozied up with a pet? I doubt it. ~ Robert Brault
I believe in animal rights, and high among them is the right to the gentle stroke of a human hand. ~ Robert Brault
Most pets display so many humanlike traits and emotions it's easy to forget they're not gifted with the English language and then get snubbed when we talk to them and they don't say anything back. ~ Stephenie Geist
Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet. ~ Colette
It often happens that a man is more humanely related to a cat or dog than to any human being. ~ Henry David Thoreau
Animals have these advantages over man: they never hear the clock strike, they die without any idea of death, they have no theologians to instruct them, their last moments are not disturbed by unwelcome and unpleasant ceremonies, their funerals cost them nothing, and no one starts lawsuits over their wills. ~ Voltaire, letter to Count Schomberg, 31 August 1769
The kind man feeds his beast before sitting down to dinner. ~ Hebrew Proverb
Lots of people talk to animals.... Not very many listen, though.... That's the problem. ~ Benjamin Hoff, The Tao of Pooh
Man is rated the highest animal, at least among all animals who returned the questionnaire. ~ Robert Brault
It is an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man - for precisely the same reasons. ~ Douglas Adams, The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy
An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. ~ Martin Buber
You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets. ~ Nora Ephron
Animals are such agreeable friends. They ask no questions; they pass no criticisms. ~ George Eliot
Ever consider what pets must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth! ~ Anne Tyler, The Accidental Tourist
No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation. - Fran Lebowitz
Cat Law of Selective Hearing "A cat can hear a mouse yawning a mile away, while filtering out the sound of a pleading human just six feet away. - Anonymous
Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this. ~ Anonymous
There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. ~ Wesley Bates
Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want. - Joseph Wood Krutch
A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution. ~ Hazel Nicholson
There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast. - Anonymous
You know your cat is getting old when she quits hunting in the back yard. Now she hunts at your dinner table.- Denny Lyon
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry
My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet. ~ Edith Wharton
He doesn’t reckon his dog has human feelings, but he sure lets you know when you hurt his instincts. ~ Robert Brault
The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog. - Ambrose Bierce
Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. ~ Roger Caras
No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as a dog does. - Christopher Morley
If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. Harry S. Truman
A dog is not intelligent. Never trust an animal that's surprised by its own farts. - Frank Skinner
The more I see of men, the more I admire dogs. Jeanne-Marie Roland
Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone. Lenny Bruce
Women are like Elephants. I like to watch them, but I wouldn't want to own one. - W. C. Fields

Political Humor

A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. - Texas Guinan
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. - George Bernard Shaw
"If we were a dog food, they would take us off the shelf." - Rep. Thomas M. Davis III (R-Va.), in a memo to colleagues about the problem with the Republican brand
"Now he tells us that he's the one who's gonna take on the old boys network. The old boys network? In the McCain campaign that's called a staff meeting. Come on!" - Barack Obama, about John McCain
"If he's the answer, then the question must be ridiculous." - New York Gov. David Patterson, on John McCain at his speech at the Democratic National Convention 2008
"I've been sleeping like a baby. Sleep two hours, wake up and cry, sleep two hours, wake up and cry.'' - John McCain, talking to Jay Leno about his election loss
"So?" —Vice President Dick Cheney, responding to an ABC News correspondent who cited a poll showing that most Americans do not believe the Iraq War was worth fighting, March 19, 2008
"So what?" –President Bush, responding to a an ABC News correspondent who pointed out that Al Qaeda wasn't a threat in Iraq until after the U.S. invaded, Dec. 14, 2008
"Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter." –President George W. Bush, in parting words to British Prime Minister Gordon Brown and French President Nicolas Sarkozy at his final G-8 Summit, punching the air and grinning widely as the two leaders looked on in shock, Rusutsu, Japan, July 10, 2008 (Oh, this is funny on so many levels...)
"I don't want to be invited to the family hunting party." - Barack Obama, on revelations that he and Dick Cheney are eighth cousins (2007)
"You can always tell when the Republicans are getting restless, because the Vice President's motorcade pulls into the Capitol, and Darth Vader emerges." – Hillary Clinton about VP Cheney in 2007
"Thanks for the question, you little jerk." -- John McCain, after being asked by a high school student if he was too old to be president. For good measure, McCain then threatened to draft him. (2007)
"I've been asked if that nickname bothers me, and the answer is, no. After all, Darth Vader is one of the nicer things I've been called recently." - Dick Cheney (2007 – this guy thrives on negative attention)
"A year ago, my approval rating was in the 30s, my nominee for the Supreme Court had just withdrawn, and my Vice President had shot someone. Ahhh, those were the good old days." – George W. Bush, at the 2007 Radio-TV Correspondents' dinner

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