Showing posts with label health news. Show all posts
Showing posts with label health news. Show all posts

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 22 Aug 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion, political humor and funny cartoons, recipes, science news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.





From Denny: I tell ya, this summer heat index of 116 degrees Fahrenheit, along with the WikiLeaks nutjob child who thinks he's stalking me on this blog, you know it's a full moon out tonight. This poor kid has scrambled eggs for brains, taking a second and third run at me.

Guess it's time to go ahead and do another WikiLeaks post to explain to him and his silly little friends living in some gaming fantasy world in their heads that real life is not a computer game. It's much more serious because the people who are stalking them are out for a lot more than winning their props as a gamer.

As far as posts go I did manage to find some interesting health and science news and had some fun with some photo posts too. Take a look.



The Social Poets:


BP Screws Over Gulf Residents With New Claims Restrictions - BP continues to play the shell game of moving the pea with misdirection and sleight of hand, with the definition of "legitimate claims" an elusive target to hit for residents.

Economy, Afghan War, America, World Politics Cartoons - 21 Aug 2010 - This week's political opinion delivered through the national cartoonists.

Obama Family Photos and New Michelle Obama Portrait Unveiled - Enjoy the new First Lady portrait and a few other well done photographs of the First Family.

Scumbag WikiLeaks Founder Assange Charged With Rape in Sweden - Sweden charges WikiLeaks founder, Julian Assange, with rape and molestation.

Poetess Defies, Shocks Saudi Arabia - A brave woman in the Middle East dares to criticize her religion and her culture - through a live TV national poetry competition, the Arab world version of American Idol.

Funny Back to School Quotes and Cartoons - Cheeky Quote Day 18 Aug 2010 - Get a grin at some great cartoons and funny quotes about parents' favorite time of the year: when the kids go back to school.

Funny Video: Truth Is Bush Tax Cuts Are 30 Percent Of Our Deficit

Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 16 Aug 2010 - Check out this week's funny late night jokes and latest cartoons lampooning politics to American culture, with a funny side dish of funny video clips thrown in to keep you grinning.

Funny Video: Newt Gingrich Mocked by Colbert For Lack of Morals - Check out Colbert as he mocks the amoral Gingrich trying to make a political comeback for President.




The Healing Waters:


Lonely people: Under More Pressure Have Higher Blood Pressure - Be aware of how loneliness can impact your daily health.

How Can You Predict The Strength of Your Relationship? - Check out the latest study and new test devised to help you predict the strength of your relationship.





The Soul Calendar:


Check Out NASA Images of Devastating Pakistan Floods - These aerial view flood images of the entire country of Pakistan are mind-boggling in their scope of how the monsoon flooding is affecting the lives of millions.

New Tomb Uncovered in Egypt With Colorful Art - The fun side of archaeology is what you find in pristine condition after thousands of years.





Dennys Funny Quotes:

Funny Odd Hunh?! Cartoons - 21 Aug 2010 - Check out this week's grinners to soothe your work week stress.

25 Ridiculously Funny Celebrity Duck Face Photos - Laugh at celebrities posing for the camera, mocking sexy.





Dennys Food and Recipes:


4 Casseroles 4 School Night Dinners: Chicken, Tex Mex, Tamale, Shepherds Pie - Check out some family favorites, easy and quick to cook - and nutritious.

Muffin Monday: 5 Yummy Breakfast Muffins - Skip the coffee shop muffin, make your own, save some money and save a whole lot of calories too.





Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:

7 Quotes: Defining Joy in Our Lives - 7 quotes to consider about how we live our joy.





Visual Insights:


Raucous Tea Party Republicans Cartoons - 21 Aug 2010 - Check out what the cartoonists are lampooning about the Tea Party and the Republican idea of politics this time!

Dennys Photo Gallery: Beautiful Yummy Artichokes and 11 Recipes

Arts: Whimsical Fiber Artist Ed Bing Lee - This fiber artist has a sense of the whimsy while he explores new ways to use simple knotting techniques to develop his art.




*** Coffee cup from Brazil photo by Quoquo at flickr


*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 15 Aug 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science news, health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.





From Denny: These are all the posts I managed to get out this week while suffering through all this crazy summer heat and humidity. This summer Louisiana didn't have the usual whiners' bragging rights about the summer heat. The rest of America got to "share" - and a lot of the world too! :)

One bit of good news: Prez Obama is thinking of lifting the oil moratorium here on the Gulf coast. Uh, yeah, put 300,000 people back to work would be helpful for this economy - not to mention the rest of America would appreciate not having their fuel prices skyrocket this winter from a low supply.

Earth to White House: It sure would be great if you would lift this moratorium immediately - and gift it to Congressman Charlie Melancon to announce it. Lifting the moratorium would help Melancon win in November against Whore House Vitter, a complete embarrassment as a senator from Louisiana. Louisiana is all a twitter and excited about getting back to work - so make it happen, Mr. Prez, and it would be much appreciated.

And to my StumbleUpon friends: Now isn't one silly email a whole lot less annoying than a bunch of "shares"? :)


The Social Poets:


Obama Blasted for Saying Religious Tolerance OK in America - Republicans try to turn the Constitution into an issue for the November elections - now they are against religious freedom for anyone not Christian.

America and World Politics Cartoons - 14 Aug 2010 - Check out the latest opinions on the economy, the November elections, the building of a mosque on Ground Zero in New York City and education in America now that budget cuts have arrived.

Obama Sends Thousands More Jobs Out of America: Mexico - Prez Obama tricked by GM to send thousands of jobs out of America and to Mexico.

Doctor Says Kids Suffer More From Gulf Oil Spill - Check out the long term impact this BP oil spill has on America's children in the Gulf region.

How Male Journalists Fight: Whiz All Over Each Other - American male journalists in the Democratic Party and the White House fuss and fight each other while the public is frustrated about the economy.

Earth to White House: Why You Are Getting Criticized - The White House is complaining it is not appreciated enough for what it has done. Here's why fellow Democrats are angry with the President.

Funny Video: Colbert Reveals Master Plan to Ruin Gay Marriage

Funny Video: Jon Stewart Comments on Gay Marriage - Californigaytion

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 8 Aug 2010 - Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.





The Soul Calendar:


BP Oil Spill and Global Warming Cartoons - 14 Aug 2010 - The BP oil spill continues in the news as they try to squirm out of paying for the error of their arrogant ways.

Check Out Spectacular August Perseid Meteor Showers - Look up in the middle of the night to see as many as 100 shooting stars above your head for a spectacular show brought to you by the Universe!





Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


How Is Your Aim In Life? - How high - or how limited - are your goals in Life?

Friendship Quote: When Friends First Meet and Connect - How friendships begin and can last a life time.





The Healing Waters:


Want Others To Think You Sexy? Wear Red - How the color of red figures into our sexual preferences.

How Funny: Your Belly Button Key to Athletic Success - Check out your body type to know which sport is easier for you to excel.






Dennys Funny Quotes:


Hunh?! Cartoons - 14 Aug 2010 - Check out this week's great cartoonists and how funny everyday life can be.

Palin Memory Fails, Writes on Her Hand: Again - Strange Sarah Palin does it again and again: writes on her hand like it's an 8th grade math test for answers to cheat the test.

Weird News: Oregon Authorities Shut Down Girls Lemonade Stand - Local Oregon government looked like jerks shutting down the all American lemonade stand because the little girl didn't own a food handler's license that only adults can purchase.

Weird News: Woman Smashes McDonalds For Not Having Her Order - Check out this weird news of the day - what happens when McDonald's doesn't have what an enraged customer wants on the breakfast menu.

Funny News: 100 Year Old Scotch Whiskey Thaws Out to Drink - Strange but true: check out this funny news of the day.






Dennys People Watching:


Meet New Baby Elephant at Vienna Zoo: Big Ears - The naming process is in full swing for this one week old baby elephant born to a Vienna, Austria zoo. Vote online for your choice.






Dennys Food and Recipes:


Chef Recipe: Seared Grouper with Crawfish, Bacon Risotto, Softshell Crab - Louisiana chefs celebrate fabulous new recipes in local food and wine competition.

Easy Slow Cooker Recipe: Macaroni Chili Cheese Casserole - For back to school busy try this simple recipe for a slow cooker the whole family is sure to enjoy.

Cake Tuesday: Buttermilk Fudge Cake With Chocolate Gloss Icing - Make a stunning tasty chocolate cake to entertain your sweet tooth.

4 Easy Summer Dishes When Its Just Too Hot to Cook - Try some easy and quick summer recipes to beat the crazy heat - and avoiding cooking with any heat.






Visual Insights:


Tea Party, Republican, Gay Marriage Cartoons - 14 Aug 2010 - Check out the usual amusing rantings from the far-right-gone-over-the-edge-crazy.



*** Coffee photo by Quoquo @ flickr



*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 8 Aug 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.





From Denny: This week I was forced "off the grid" on two different days. Monday and to noon Tuesday my server was off line - which is rare - but when it happens on a Monday I always figure there was an obnoxious computer virus attack. Then again on Thursday we had some seriously severe thunderstorms in our area for the day, lots of intense lightning which we never used to see until this year. Even my outdoor cats made a run for inside the house with a "Make way, lady, we're running in full speed: incoming!"

Well, I made good use of the "snail time" and read some "snail books" - quite the treat when normally I'm fast paced and hard-charging. I might try this "off the grid" vacation a bit more often as it was enjoyable! Anyway, I wasn't able to publish all that I wanted to this week and will see what I can do to get caught up for you. Thanks for your continued support, much appreciated! :)


The Social Poets:


Cartoons: American Economy, Immigration, Iraq and Afghan Wars - 7 Aug 2010 - Check out what the cartoonists think this week about the smoke and mirrors going on in politics and the Afghan and Iraq Wars.

Vision of The Gardener Prophet poem - Libations Friday 6 Aug 2010 - 2012 begins early. Check out a poem of prophecy warning humanity.

What Is Prez Obama Really Thinking? Watch His Hands As He Talks - Our body language reveals much about our thoughts, telegraphing it to others if only we learn the language and how to read it.

Is The Oil Spill Really Gone in the Gulf, More Smoke And Mirrors From BP? - *** More bizarre reports from the BP and government corners trying to end the the politics about the Gulf oil spill, when all they did was stir up a hornet's nest of criticism and anger.

Speaker Pelosi Champions Unemployed, Orders House Back From Vacation - *** Speaker Pelosi relentlessly drives hard to pass two important bills: keep teachers in the classrooms and hire the unemployed out of work for two years.

Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 2 Aug 2010 - *** Check out jokes from the late night comedians about American society, funny videos from Colbert and Stewart and a few of the newest political cartoons.

Funny Video: Jon Stewart Mocks Media For Sorry WikiLeaks Reaction - *** Check out Jon Stewart as he rips to shreds, in fine mocking style, the not so stealthy WikiLeaks leaker.

Funny Video: Colberts Live Tony Hayward Cam Tracking His Slow Resignation - *** Check out Colbert's reaction to BP finally - OK, temporarily - plugging the Gulf oil leak. The best news yet is the slow motion firing of BP CEO Tony Hayward.

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 1 Aug 2010 - ** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science and health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.






The Soul Calendar:

BP Oil Spill and WikiLeaks Spill Cartoons - 7 Aug 2010 - Check out what the cartoonists were lampooning this week, skewering BP for the Gulf oil spill and the WikiLeaks documents spill.

How Northern Lights Are Created By Sun Flares - Check out 3 video clips of the solar flares and magnetic filament in action as they create the Northern Lights on Earth.





Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:

2012: What Will Happen to Earth and Us? - What you can do to ensure your safety and survival as geologic time rapidly changes - and the resulting paradigm shift of humanity - is in the process of occurring.





Dennys Funny Quotes:


Hunh?! Just Plain Bizarre Funny Cartoons - 7 Aug 2010

Funny Video: BP Creates Rich Fish in Gulf Oil Spill - Mocking BP: An idiot public relations BP talking head points out the up side to the oil leak: the fish are rich!

Murphys 15 Laws About Sex - Yet another funny list joke making the rounds.

Funny Legal News Story: The Case of a Contraceptives Miss-taken Use - Laugh at this funny use for a contraceptive that exemplifies the kind of humorous cases found in our court systems every day sure to amuse us!

Funny Video: Colberts Sound Advice on How to Get a Job - Bad economy? No problem. Comic Stephen Colbert to the employment rescue to help you land that all important life-changing job.

Funny Video: Surfing Group Known as The Radical Rodents - Laugh at these funny talented rodents surfing the waves in Australia.




Dennys People Watching:

Ethics Investigations in Congress Cartoons - 7 Aug 2010 - Check out what the cartoonists had to say this week about political corruption and the Speaker's promise to drain The Swamp. Washington, D.C. sits on a literal swamp so it's natural to get a few rats running around the place.




Dennys Food and Recipes:

Chef Bergeron Appetizer: Zucchini Cakes With Unusual Garlic Dill Sour Cream Mayo Sauce - Check out a simple veggie recipe that can be an appetizer or served as an entree, your choice. And what an unusual outstanding yummy sauce.

Cake Tuesday: Italian Cream Cake - One of my favorite cakes to order a slice for dessert when we dine out - and also an easy cake to make at home!

Muffin Monday: Coconut Muffins - Check out this simple easy recipe and enjoy a sweet breakfast or afternoon snack.




Visual Insights:


Gay Marriage and Society Cartoons - 7 Aug 2010 - The more things change, the more they remain the same. As gays battle for their right to marry, soon they discover the same marital experiences as everyone else. Check out the cartoonists this week.

Funny Photos: How Your Brain Can Be Fooled - Funny photos that prove how easy it is to fool your brain into interpreting a photo to mean something other than is actually true.




*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 1 Aug 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science and health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.







The Social Poets:


WikiLeaks, America, Tea Party, World Politics Cartoons - 31 July 2010

Walk The World poem - Libations Friday 30 July 2010 - A poem about sharing our life with others - when we are both in need - to receive the greatest gift.

Is The Middle Class Almost Extinct in America?

Funny Brain Quotes - Cheeky Quote Day - 28 July 2010

How Devastating Are Those 92,000 Wikileaks Leaked Afghan War Docs?

Monday Morning Brain Owners Manual

Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 26 July 2010

Funny Video: Colbert On The Environment - Run! Animals!

Funny Video: Colbert Cleans Up the Gulf

Funny Video: Sarah Palins Geography Song 50 Nifty States

Funny Video: Colbert On The Environment - Awww, Animals!

Monday Morning Brain Owners Manual

Posts Roundup of Dennys Blogs - 25 July 2010





The Healing Waters:


Easy Steps You Can Take For Computer Eye Strain

Can Child Abuse Cause Heart Attacks Later in Life?

Celebrities Who Fought Postpartum Depression





Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


17 Short Beautiful Love Poems

What Do You Feel About Love?




The Soul Calendar:


BP Oil Spill Cartoons - 31 July 2010

Giant Asteroid Threatens Earth In 170 Years





Dennys Food and Recipes:


Cake Tuesday: Chef Bobby Flays Throwdown Competition Carrot Cake, Coconut Cake

Chef Spike Monday: Fun Recipes For Pizza, Burger and Salads

Chocolate Bread Pudding in a Slow Cooker





Dennys Funny Quotes:


Funny Hunh?! Cartoons - 31 July 2010

Funny Video: Colbert On The Environment - Wimpy Treehuggers, Dirty Hippies

Funny Video: Kimmel Says Palin Is Like The Eskimo Don King





Visual Insights:


Music: Paul McCartney Honored at Obama White House

Music News - A Song Of Longing: Harmony to My Heartbeat

Dennys Photo Gallery: Summer Heat Wave




*** Photo by heliosphan @ flickr


*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Posts Roundup of Dennys Blogs - 25 July 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science and health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.






The Social Poets:


Cartoons: American and World Politics, Tea Party - 24 July 2010

Govt Justice Dept Wastes $100 Million on Partying With Taxpayer Money

Govt Sex Perverts: Pentagon, Govt Spooks Watching Child Porn - News Headlines 23 July 2010

Just How Angry Are Americans At Their Prez and Politicians?

Americans Sour on Economy, Obamas Better Plan to Manage Our Oceans - News Headlines 21 July 2010

Funny Economy Humor - Cheeky Quote Day 21 July 2010

Unemployed About To Get Relief, Brit PM Visit, Fox Lies About Govt Official - News Headlines 20 July 2010


Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 20 July 2010

Funny Video: Wanna Work in the Fields Like the Immigrants?

Funny Video: Colbert Talks Food For Thought - Canwich Setback

Funny Video: Colberts Automatic Weapons For The People


Obama Shouts At Republicans, What We Get Out Of Financial Reform - News Headlines 19 July 2010





Beautiful Illustrated Quotation:


So How Do You Measure Your Spiritual Progress?

How Psychic Are You? Fun Test and Spiritual Gifts






Dennys Funny Quotes:


Hunh?! Are You Crazy?! Cartoons - 24 July 2010

Recession Humor: Termination Letter to Employees

Funny GOP: From The Bush Years - Homeland Security Self-Exam

Funny Video: Economic Fun Fair by Mark Fiore





Dennys Food and Recipes:


Cake Tuesday: Lemon Honey Cake and Lemon Bread

Muffin Monday: Dennys Summer Fresh Muffins






The Healing Waters:


Why Are So Many People Addicted to Pain Meds? Numbers Up 400 Percent

Just How Fast Is Human Evolution?






The Soul Calendar:


BP Oil Spill Cartoons - 24 July 2010






Visual Insights:


Cartoons: American Economy - 24 July 2010



*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets
The Social Poets Fav Bloggers
The Soul Calendar
Visual Insights
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations
Poems From A Spiritual Heart
The Healing Waters
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 18 July 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science and health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.






The Social Poets:


Dark Humor: BP Oil Spill Cartoons - 17 July 2010

America, World Politics, Sports Cartoons - 17 July 2010

Sweltering Summer Heat poem - Libations Friday 9 July 2010

BP Plays Games With Oil Spill, Democrats Face Huge Losses in November

Funny Texting Quotes - Cheeky Quote Day 14 July 2010

Why Obama Is Failing Miserably At Running America

Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 12 July 2010

Funny Video: Colbert Mocks Republican Men Hairstyles

Colbert: Rent a White Guy in China For Business Meeting Prestige

Funny Video: Colbert Rips Glenn Beck For His "Wildly Important" Work

Celebrity: Chelsea Clinton Wedding Day Details

Posts Roundup of Dennys Blogs - 11 July 2010




Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


Kabbalah Quotes: How to Know You Are On The Right Path For You

Madonna Offends Traditional Jewish Kabbalists in Israel




The Healing Waters:


How To Exercise Effectively On A Hot Day: Drink A Slushie

How Bad Is High-Fructose Corn Syrup For Your Health?




The Soul Calendar:


Popular Funny X-ray Pin-Ups Calendar: Stripped to the Bone

Are These Fossils The Earliest Traces Of Complex Life?




Dennys Funny Quotes:


Hunh?! Cartoons - 17 July 2010

Funny GOP: Ridiculous Republicans Dictionary

Funny GOP: The 10 Commandments Republican Style

Funny LOL Work Jokes

Funny GOP: Limbaughs 18 Rules of Right Wing Talk Show Bombast

Funny GOP: Conservatives Prayer to Capitalism God




Dennys Food and Recipes:


How To Make Your Own Pimento Cheese Spread From Southern Living Magazine

Easy Healthy Dessert: Orange Gel n Fresh Fruit

Craving Ice: Is It A Sign of Anemia?

Cake Tuesday: 4 Cakes Celebrating America

Muffin Monday: Chocolate Chip Orange Muffins




Visual Insights:


Cartoons: America and Immigration - 17 July 2010

Funny Comic Betty White Gets Her Own Calendar

Photography and Poetry: Release Your Dreams and Spring into Life



*** Photo by heliosphan @ flickr


*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets
The Soul Calendar
Visual Insights
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations
Poems From A Spiritual Heart
The Healing Waters
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Posts Roundup of Dennys Blogs - 11 July 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science and health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.





From Denny: With the new and faster features offered by Blogger lately, I decided to go ahead and take the jump. All of my three food blogs are now neatly compiled into one blog: Dennys Food and Recipes.

For the past year I've been experimenting with small niche writing like the so-called internet SEO experts preach. As far as writing goes, I felt constrained in too small a space. Yes, I'm one of those kids who skipped coloring outside the lines in coloring books and took it to a whole new level. I colored whole murals on my bedroom walls. It sure beat the pedestrian mind-dull wallpaper my parents used to cover unsightly and uneven plaster walls in a 160 year old New England house. My father knew how to properly plaster walls since his father was a commercial and residential contracter among other talents - he just didn't want to go to the bother. So, I had my own solution.

I have my own solutions too for these many blogs and I'm combining several of them. What the statistics have proven over the past year is that once a generalist always a generalist. Roaming intellectually is fun for me and I like to bring home my finds for others to enjoy whether it's for mind food or just a good silly laugh.

The new large recipe blog is finished and is called Dennys Food and Recipes. You can find everything from pasta to chocolate to Louisiana food. There are recent food videos and food from other countries like the Olympics food from Canada. The Muffin Monday segments feature bed and breakfast inn recipes from primarily America and Canada to help support small business over Big Business. Supporting small business helps build up and stabilize the economy. It's small business owners who are the heroes of the economic world as they hire at least 70 percent of the workers in America. Supporting them to do well helps you!



The Social Poets:


Cartoons: BP Oil Spill, American Economy Opinion, Russian Spies in America - 10 July 2010

27, 000 Aging Abandoned Leaking Oil Wells in Gulf of Mexico

Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 5 July 2010

Funny Video: Jon Stewart Lampoons The G-20 Summit

Funny Video: Jon Stewart Says Republicans Want Clinton Blamed, Not Bush

Funny Video: Colbert Lampoons BPs Positive Spin On Oil Spill

Funny Video: How BP CEO Hayward Can Improve His Image

Funny Video: Kimmel Compares BP To Al Qaeda

Posts Roundup at Dennys 14 Blogs - 4 July 2010




The Healing Waters:


Easy Healthy Dessert: Orange Gel n Fresh Fruit




Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


How Do You Assess Change in Yourself?

How Do We Prepare Ourselves For Change?

How Does Change Crash Into Our Lives to Build Anew?





Dennys Food and Recipes:


Muffin Monday: The Best Blueberry Muffins - also there is Kale's Chocolate Zucchini Bread and Sophia's Banana Chocolate Chip Bread from this same bed and breakfast inn.

Muffin Monday: Sweet Potato Muffins

Cake Tuesday: Red, White and Blue Independence Day Cake

Cake Tuesday: Red, White and Blueberry Shortcakes

Cake Tuesday: Shenandoah Apple Cake

Popular Posts 2010 at Romancing The Chocolate and Thank You!

Popular Posts 2009 at Romancing The Chocolate and Thank You!

Chocolate Cake Recipes at Romancing The Chocolate

Funny Quotes About Chocolate

Popular Posts 2010 at Comfort Food From Louisiana and Thank You!

Popular Posts 2009 at Comfort Food From Louisiana and Thank You!

Popular Posts at Unusual 2 Tasty




Dennys Funny Quotes:


Obama, American and World Politics - 10 July 2010

Hunh?! Cartoons - 10 July 2010

How You Know You Have Dreaded Teabagger Disease





Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious And Odd:


Outrageous Funny Photos: This Is So Wrong...





Visual Insights:


Music Video: Rusty Hammerstrom - Oil in the Water

Music News: Beatles Ringo Starr Turned 70

Music News: Featuring Marilyn Monroes Jazz Pianist Hank Jones



*** Cup of Spanish Hot Chocolate Photo by heliosphan @ flickr


*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets
The Soul Calendar
Visual Insights
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations
Poems From A Spiritual Heart
The Healing Waters
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys 14 Blogs - 4 July 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.




Cup of coffee from Brazil by il Quoquo @ flickr




The Social Poets:


Fourth of July Fireworks Cartoons - 3 July 2010

How Do We Live Freedom and Liberty? Libations Friday - 2 July 2010

8 Funny Posts 4 A Grin From Dennys Blogs - 2 July 2010

How To Save Obamas Presidency AND The American Economy

Funny Smile Quotes - Cheeky Quote Day - 30 June 2010

American Revolt: How You Can Break Big Business, Big Banks, Big Insurance, Big Oil, Big Lobbyists

Roundup of Late Night Funnies: BP Oil Spill, McChrystal Firing - 28 June 2010

Funny Video: Colbert Says McChrystal Had To Have Been High

Funny Video: Stewart Nails Republicans As Flip-Floppers On BP Escrow Fund

Funny Video: Colbert Lampoons Barton's BP Apology

Funny Video: Stewart Lampoons McChrystal's Balls For An Honorable Discharge




Dennys Global Politics:


American and World Politics Cartoons - 3 July 2010

Taiwans Whale-Sized Skimmer to Gulf Coast Rescue, Obama Ranked High as 15th Prez - News Headlines 2 July 2010

Kagan Takes Hits From GOP For Not Being Christian Enough - News Headlines 1 July 2010

8 Funny Posts 4 A Grin From Dennys Blogs - 30 June 2010

Spies Among Us, Scumbag Congress Denies Food to Children of Unemployed - News Headlines 29 June 2010






Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


63 Quotes About Freedom and Liberty: Happy Birthday, America!

Why Smiling is Good For Your Spiritual Health: 7 Quotes About Smiling





Poems From A Spiritual Heart:


Fourth of July When Life is Simple





The Healing Waters:


Craving Ice: Is It A Sign of Anemia?




How I decided to start helping the economy recover: promoting small businesses while blogging on Muffin Monday recipes. I'm promoting bed and breakfast inns over Big Business hotel chains.


Romancing The Chocolate:


Cake Tuesday: Shenandoah Apple Cake

Muffin Monday: Chocolate Cheesecake Muffins

Cake Tuesday: Coffee Toffee Fudge Cake, Tunnel of Fudge Cake






Comfort Food From Louisiana:


Cake Tuesday: Red, White and Blueberry Shortcakes


Muffin Monday: Sour Cream Walnut Cinnamon Muffins






Unusual 2 Tasty:


Muffin Monday: Egg, Ricotta Cheese, Sun-Dried Tomato Breakfast Muffins

Cake Tuesday: Red, White and Blue Independence Day Cake





Dennys Funny Quotes:


Dark Humor: BP Oil Spill Cartoons - 3 July 2010

5 Funny Shorts: What Kids Think About Love and Life




Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious And Odd:


Funny Iran Sanctions Cartoons 3 July 2010

Funny Video: Surfing Group Known as The Radical Rodents





Visual Insights:


Hunh?! Cartoons - 3 July 2010

Dennys Photo Gallery: Fourth of July Spectacular Fireworks




*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets
Dennys Global Politics
The Soul Calendar
Visual Insights
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations
Poems From A Spiritual Heart
The Healing Waters
Dennys Art Sanctuary
Romancing The Chocolate
Comfort Food From Louisiana
Unusual 2 Tasty
Dennys Blog Feeds
Dennys Funny Quotes
Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious And Odd

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Posts Roundup of Dennys 14 Blogs - 27 June 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science and health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.




Cup of coffee from Brazil by il Quoquo @ flickr





The Social Poets:


Dark Humor: BP Oil Spill Cartoons - 26 June 2010

Fourth of July When Life is Simple poem - Libations Friday 25 June 2010

Pentagon Junkyard Dogs Bow to Obama Pressure

Funny Lawyer Quotes and Jokes - Cheeky Quote Day 23 June 2010

Gen. McChrystal Out For Crudely Dissing The President

Roundup of Late Night Funnies - 21 June 2010

Funny Video: Colberts The Word, Stay the Course

Funny Video: Colberts Simplified Version of Obama's BP Oil Spill Speech

Funny Video: Colbert Examines America's Strained Relationship With England

Funny Video: Stewarts Take On America's Oil Dependence

Funny Video: Stewart Calls Joe Barton A 'Disdainful A--hole'

Posts Roundup at Dennys 14 Blogs - 20 June 2010




Dennys Global Politics:


American and World Politics Cartoons - 26 June 2010

Unemployed Americans Screwed by the Republicans Again - News Headlines 24 June 2010

McChrystal as Dems Political Disaster - News Headlines - 22 June 2010





The Healing Waters:


Living Art Exhibit: Public Play at NY Times Square Pianos

Exploding Number of Young Widows in the World

Good News: Kids Sell Lemon Aid 4 Pelicans Hurt in the Gulf





Poems From A Spiritual Heart:


An Audience of One

10 Funny Posts For a Laugh - 23 June 2010

Life is About Everything

Stepping Through Life

Hope Transforms

Jazz Music




The Soul Calendar:


Big Oil Nixs Competing Aviation BioFuel: NASAs Project OMEGA




Romancing The Chocolate:


Cake Tuesday: Coffee Toffee Fudge Cake, Tunnel of Fudge Cake

Muffin Monday: Pina Colada Muffins




Unusual 2 Tasty:


Muffin Monday: Polynesian Bread or Muffins, Gluten Free Pineapple Muffin

Muffin Monday: Savory Feta, Roasted Pepper Basil Muffins From Sur La Table




Comfort Food From Louisiana:


Cake Tuesday: Fresh Peach Coffee Cake

Muffin Monday: Banana Praline Muffins, White Chocolate Banana Bread




Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious And Odd:


Funny Legal News Story: The Case of a Contraceptives Misstaken Use

Funny Cartoon: What to Wear For Employee Review




Dennys Funny Quotes:


Funny General McChrystal Cartoons - 26 June 2010

10 Funny Signs and 10 Funny Short Jokes




Visual Insights:


Dennys Photo Gallery: Fourth of July Watermelon




*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets
Dennys Global Politics
The Soul Calendar
Visual Insights
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations
Poems From A Spiritual Heart
The Healing Waters
Dennys Art Sanctuary
Romancing The Chocolate
Comfort Food From Louisiana
Unusual 2 Tasty
Dennys Blog Feeds
Dennys Funny Quotes
Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious And Odd

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys 14 Blogs - 13 June 2010

*** Check out news, political opinion - serious and funny cartoons, recipes, science and health news, poetry, funny posts, photography, spiritual thoughts and great quotes.




Cup of coffee from Brazil by il Quoquo @ flickr




The Social Poets:



Louisiana to NY Mayor Bloomberg: Shut the F Up! - BP Oil Spill Cartoons - 12 June 2010

Hope Transforms poem - Libations Friday 11 June 2010 - A poem about how Hope works to transform our lives.

BP Promotes Philosophy: The Minimum Acceptable

Roundup of Late Night Comedy - 7 June 2010

Funny Videos: Stewart and Colbert Lampoon Reporter Helen Thomas

Funny Video: Lampooning Racists Gone Wild Horrified Teaching Chinese Language

Funny Video: Jon Stewart Lampoons Glenn Beck About Exclusive Israeli Raid News



The Soul Calendar:


Effective Cheap Idea to Clean Up Oil Spill: Treated Cotton Fabric




Dennys Global Politics:


American and World Politics Cartoons - 12 June 2010

Speaker Pelosi, Residents Fire Upon BP - News Headlines 11 June 2010

Krewe of Dead Pelicans BP Protest Parade, Oil Spill Stories - News Headlines 8 June 2010



Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


How Are Hopes, Dreams and Reality Related?

Where Does Hope Guide Us On Our Life Path?

Hope: Unborn Baby Grabs onto Doctors Hand in Surgery

Does Hope Touch Your Soul?




Poems From A Spiritual Heart:


Jazz Music - Get lost in the moment living a New Orleans night...

Angels Left Behind: Orphans of the World - Poem about remembering the children of the world need our help.

Water of Life - Have you ever wondered the messages Nature speaks to us every day, happening every minute all around us? Great Nature photos.

Peace Upon The Land - A Memorial Day poem to honor ourselves.




The Healing Waters:


Oldest Living Woman in World Now in Indonesia

12 Hidden Reasons 4 Fatigue and How to Fight Fatigue

Anti-Aging Summer Drinks From CBS and Health Magazine




Dennys Funny Quotes:


Ouch: Reporter Helen Thomas Career Ender Comments Cartoons

Funny Video: Upright Citizens Brigade Mocks BP Execs

Funny Video: Colbert Mocks Birthers Using Obama Rap Video Sighting

Funny Dance Video: Butt Face Slam From Brazil




Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious And Odd:


Obamas Kick Ass Comments Cartoons

Funny Video: BP Creates Rich Fish in Gulf Oil Spill

Funny: Actresses Sandra Bullock, Scarlett Johannson Kiss at MTV Movie Awards - How a photo can look like more than it is.




Comfort Food From Louisiana:


New Orleans Food: G.Gs Stuffed Crab




Romancing The Chocolate:


Popular Kentucky Derby Recipes: Bourbon Ball French Toast, Kentucky Hot Brown



Visual Insights:

Dennys Photo Gallery: Wonderful Father Photos



*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 30 May 2010

*** Check out what's happening at all 14 of Denny's blogs: news, politics, political cartoons, poetry, great recipes, science and health news, photography, humor and spiritual thoughts from great quotes.



Cup of coffee from Brazil by il Quoquo @ flickr




The Social Poets:

Obama Cowers to BP: Rejects Super Tankers for Gulf Clean Up

Whats Happening in America This Week: BP Oil Spill Cartoons - 29 May 2010

Peace Upon The Land poem – Libations Friday 28 May 2010

Check It Out: Rolling Stones Mag Names 5 Best Songs Ever

BP Oil Spill: White House Updated News - 24 May 2010

Transcript of White House Press Briefing on 24 May 2010

Roundup of Late Night Funnies and Funny Videos - 24 May 2010

Funny Video: Outgoing British Leaders Walk of Shame After Election

Funny Video: Colbert Mocks Glenn Beck for Comparing Himself to God and MLK


Funny Video: Jon Stewart Sees BP Fixing Oil Spill with Stupid Anagrams

Posts Roundup at Dennys Blogs - 23 May 2010




Dennys Global Politics:


American and World Politics Cartoons - 29 May 2010


Child Porn Social Site Busted - News Headlines 27 May 2010

Use NASA 4 Oil Spill Help, Corrupt MMS, Lightning Rod Rahm Emanuel - News Headlines 26 May 2010




Beautiful Illustrated Quotations:


What Is Your Quality of Listening to Truly Benefit From the Hearing?





Photo by Helen Maria Bjornsd/Nordic Photos/Getty Images


The Soul Calendar:


Passionate Volcano Chasers: Photographing Eruptions Around the World

Why Black Holes Burst With Light When Galaxies Merge




The Healing Waters:





*** Photo by asobitsuchiya @ flickr



Heart Health: Beware of Sugar Pirates in Your Diet

Coming Soon: Get an Orgasm Boost with Female Viagra




Humor blogs:


Tea Party and Rand Paul Cartoons - 29 May 2010

Funny Facebook Cartoons - 29 May 2010




Romancing The Chocolate:






Cream Cheese n Sour Cherry Filling 4 Chocolate Cupcakes

Chocolate Cream Cake with Chocolate Frosting

Battle Belly Fat: Fudgy Dark Chocolate Brownies, Chocolate French Toast

Simple Summer: 2 Super Easy Spaghetti Sauces



Comfort Food From Louisiana:


Seafood Recipes: Crawfish Casserole, Crawfish Corn Bread, Crawfish Tortellini

Easy Recipes: 4 Versions of Crawfish Pie



Unusual 2 Tasty:

Battle Belly Fat: Pan-Seared Shrimp Tacos, Crunchy Crust "Mac n Cheese,” Oven Fries

Spicy Shrimp Fra Diavolo Sauce Used 3 Ways: Seafood, Chicken, Polenta

Elegant Cheap Dishes From Manhattan Chef: Chicken With 40 Garlic Cloves, Salad and Dessert

2 Crowd Pleasing Easy Casseroles: Mexican Lasagna, Turkey Tetrazzini




Visual Insights:


Memorial Day Madness Cartoons - 29 May 2010





Poems From A Spiritual Heart: This is a poetry only blog so the poems don't get lost in the noise of all my other posts on The Social Poets. So, if you are in the mood just for a quick read of some simple poetry I'm parking it here after it debuts on the Libations Friday segments.


Peace Upon The Land

The Mystics Arrive

We Are All Sleeping Beauties

Legacy of Love

Honoring Ourselves

Pollen Storms

Snowing The Perfect Balance

The 11 Choices

The Smallest Earth Day Poem

Three Endings and One Beginning

One Mother and One Child

Release Your Dreams and Spring into Life



*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!
Related Posts with Thumbnails

This Week's Fav Cartoon

Moderately Confused

Genius

  • A genius is one who can do anything except make a living. - Joey Lauren Adams
  • A genius is one who shoots at something no one else can see - and hits it. - Anonymous
  • A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters
  • A harmless hilarity and a buoyant cheerfulness are not infrequent concomitants of genius; and we are never more deceived than when we mistake gravity for greatness, solemnity for science, and pomposity for erudition. - Charles Caleb Colton
  • Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage - to move in the opposite direction. - E.F. Schumacker
  • Character is higher than intellect. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • Coffee is good for talent, but genius wants prayer. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Common sense is not so common. - Voltaire
  • Every man is a potential genius - until he does something. - Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree
  • Every man of genius is considerably helped by being dead. - Robert S. Lynd
  • Every person of genius is considerably helped by being dead. - Robert S. Lun
  • Every true genius is bound to be naive. - J.C.F. von Schiller
  • Everyone is a genius at least once a year. The real geniuses simply have their bright ideas closer together. - Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
  • Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense. - Josh Billings
  • Genius is an African who dreams up snow. - Vladimir Nabokov
  • Genius is more often found in a cracked pot than in a whole one. - E.B. White
  • Genius is nothing but a great aptitude for patience. - George-Louis de Buffon
  • Genius lasts longer than Beauty. That accounts for the fact that we all take such pains to over-educate ourselves. - Oscar Wilde
  • Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The trouble-makers. The round heads in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status-quo. You can quote them. Disagree with them. Glorify, or vilify them. But the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do. - Apple Computer
  • His genius he was quite content in one brief sentence to define; Of inspiration one percent, of perspiration, ninety nine. - Thomas A. Edison
  • I am convinced all of humanity is born with more gifts than we know. Most are born geniuses and just get de-geniused rapidly. - Buckminster Fuller
  • I can't tell you if genius is hereditary, because heaven has granted me no offspring. - James McNeill Whistler
  • I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up. - Mark Twain, "The Innocents Abroad"
  • I think the world is run by C students. - Al McGuire
  • I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered together at the White House, with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone. - John F. Kennedy, in an address to Nobel Prize winners
  • I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde. - Dolly Parton
  • If children grew up according to early indications, we should have nothing but geniuses. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
  • If the Aborigine drafted an I.Q. test, all of Western civilization would presumably flunk it. - Stanley Garn
  • If the human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we couldn't. - Emerson M. Pugh
  • In every work of genius, we recognize our own rejected thoughts; they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty. - Ralph Waldo Emerson, "Self Reliance," Essays, 1841
  • Mad, adj.: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence. - Ambrose Bierce
  • Man becomes man only by his intelligence, but he is man only by his heart. - Henri Frederic Amiel
  • Men of genius are meteors destined to burn themselves out in lighting up their age. - Napoleon Bonaparte, Discours de Lyon, 1771
  • Passion holds up the bottom of the universe and genius paints up its roof. - Chao Chang
  • Perhaps imagination is only intelligence having fun. - George Scialabra
  • Primitive does not mean stupid. - Anonymous
  • Since when was genius found respectable? - Elizabeth Barrett Browning
  • Some people take more care to hide their wisdom than their folly. - Jonathan Swift, Thoughts on Various Subjects, 1711
  • Sometimes, indeed, there is such a discrepancy between the genius and his human qualities that one has to ask oneself whether a little less talent might not have been better. - Carl Jung
  • Talent is that which is in a man's power; genius is that in whose power a man is. - James Russell Lowell, Literary Essays
  • The course of every intellectual, if he pursues his journey long and unflinchingly enough, ends in the obvious, from which the non-intellectuals have never stirred. - Aldous Huxley
  • The difference between intelligence and education is this: intelligence will make you a good living. - Charles F. Kettering
  • The invention of IQ does a great disservice to creativity in education. - Joel Hildebrand
  • The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius. - Oscar Wilde
  • The reluctance to put away childish things may be a requirement of genius. - Rebecca Pepper Sinkler
  • There is nobody so irritating as somebody with less intelligence and more sense than we have. - Don Herold
  • This is the nature of genius, to be able to grasp the knowable even when no one else recognizes that it is present. - Deepak Chopra
  • Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others. - Mark Twain
  • We know that the nature of genius is to provide idiots with ideas twenty years later. - Louis Aragon
  • We should not only use the brains we have, but all that we can borrow. - President Woodrow Wilson
  • We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality. - Albert Einstein
  • What a distressing contrast there is between the radiant intelligence of the child and the feeble mentality of the average adult. - Sigmund Freud
  • When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. - Jonathan Swift

Advice

  • Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself. - Cicero
  • A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice. - Edgar Watson Howe, Country Town Sayings, 1911
  • I always pass on good advice. It's the only thing to do with it. It is never any use to oneself. - Oscar Wilde, An Ideal Husband, 1895
  • Sometimes I give myself admirable advice, but I am incapable of taking it. - Mary Wortley Montagu
  • I never had a man come to me for advice yet, but what I soon discovered that he thought more of his own opinion than he did of mine. - Josh Billings
  • No one wants advice - only corroboration. - John Steinbeck, The Winter of Our Discontent
  • It is more easy to be wise for others than for ourselves. - François Duc de La Rochefoucauld
  • We hate to have some people give us advice because we know how badly they need it themselves. - Anonymous
  • The best way to succeed in life is to act on the advice we give to others. - Anonymous
  • When we ask advice we are usually looking for an accomplice. - Charles Varlet de La Grange, PensĂ©es, 1872
  • Old men are fond of giving good advice, to console themselves for being no longer in a position to give bad examples. - François La Rochefoucauld
  • The best advice is this: Don't take advice and don't give advice. - Anonymous
  • When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants, and I give it to him. - Henry Wheeler Shaw, a.k.a. Josh Billings
  • Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it. - Gordon R. Dickson
  • Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't. - Erica Jong, How to Save Your Own Life, 1977

Children

  • There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff
  • Children are contemptuous, haughty, irritable, envious, sneaky, selfish, lazy, flighty, timid, liars and hypocrites, quick to laugh and cry, extreme in expressing joy and sorrow, especially about trifles, they'll do anything to avoid pain but they enjoy inflicting it: little men already. - Jean de La BruyĂšre, Les CaractĂšres, 1688
  • The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old. - Joan Kerr, Please Don't Eat the Daisies, 1957
  • If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers. - Edgar W. Howe
  • There's nothing that can help you understand your beliefs more than trying to explain them to an inquisitive child. - Frank A. Clark
  • Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime. - Red Skelton
  • Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed. - Robert Gallagher
  • Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller
  • Children's talent to endure stems from their ignorance of alternatives. - Maya Angelou, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, 1969
  • Women gather together to wear silly hats, eat dainty food, and forget how unresponsive their husbands are. Men gather to talk sports, eat heavy food, and forget how demanding their wives are. Only where children gather is there any real chance of fun. - Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
  • Children find everything in nothing; men find nothing in everything. - Giacomo Leopardi, Zibaldone Scelto
  • Do your kids a favor - don't have any. - Robert Orben
  • There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and his mother's age. - Benjamin Spock, Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care, 1945
  • A child seldom needs a good talking to as a good listening to. - Robert Brault
  • It is not easy to be crafty and winsome at the same time, and few accomplish it after the age of six. - John W. Gardner and Francesca Gardner Reese
  • What is a home without children? Quiet. - Henny Youngman
  • While we try to teach our children all about life, Our children teach us what life is all about. - Angela Schwindt
  • Little girls are cute and small only to adults. To one another they are not cute. They are life-sized. - Margaret Atwood
  • The prime purpose of being four is to enjoy being four - of secondary importance is to prepare for being five. - Jim Trelease, The Read-Aloud Handbook, 1985
  • In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley
  • A child is a curly dimpled lunatic. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • A little girl is sugar and spice and everything nice - especially when she's taking a nap. - Anonymous
  • Children seldom misquote. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said. - Anonymous (maybe Art Linkletter?)
  • There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • Like fruit, children are sweetest just before they turn bad. - Dena Groquet
  • Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Boy, n.: a noise with dirt on it. - Not Your Average Dictionary
  • Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next. - Franklin P. Jones
  • In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children. The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted. The result is unruly children and childish adults. - Thomas Szasz
  • You are worried about seeing him spend his early years in doing nothing. What! Is it nothing to be happy? Nothing to skip, play, and run around all day long? Never in his life will he be so busy again. - Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Emile, 1762
  • Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man. - Rabindranath Tagore
  • Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky. - Fran Lebowitz
  • Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. - John W. Whitehead, The Stealing of America, 1983
  • Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford
  • A child can ask questions that a wise man cannot answer. - Anonymous
  • Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
  • We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley
  • A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn't act that way very often. - Anonymous
  • You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. - Franklin P. Jones
  • We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. - Stacia Tauscher

About Humor

  • The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Anonymous
  • I think the next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it. - Frank Howard Clark
  • I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humor. - Edward Albee
  • Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully. - Max Eastman
  • Humor is the affectionate communication of insight. - Leo Rosten
  • Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth. - Citor Borge
  • Humor is richly rewarding to the person who employs it. It has some value in gaining and holding attention, but it has no persuasive value at all. - John Kenneth Galbraith
  • A sense of humor... is needed armor. Joy in one's heart and some laughter on one's lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life. - Hugh Sidey
  • A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor, for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself. - Jessammyn West
  • A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of life. - William A. Ward
  • Comedy has to be based on truth. You take the truth and you put a little curlicue at the end. - Sid Caesar
  • Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing. - William James
  • Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven. - Mark Twain
  • Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding. - Agnes Repplier
  • Humor is just another defense against the universe. - Mel Brooks
  • Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn. - Irvin S. Cobb
  • Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs. - Christopher Morley
  • Humor is reason gone mad. - Groucho Marx
  • A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke - and that the joke is oneself. - Clifton Paul Fadiman
  • A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles. - Mignon McLaughlin
  • A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road. - Henry Ward Beecher
  • A joke is a very serious thing. - Winston Churchill

Birthday Quotes

  • Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. - Tom Wilson
  • Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. - Jennifer Yane
  • Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. - Larry Lorenzoni
  • May you live to be a hundred years - With one extra year to repent.
  • The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. - Lucille Ball
  • Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. - Jean Paul Richter
  • A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost
  • I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now.
  • You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience.
  • I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. - George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
  • Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
  • Youth is a disease from which we all recover. - Dorothy Fulheim
  • First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. - Branch Rickey
  • Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. - Bob Hope
  • Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. - Truman Capote
  • Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. - Dan Bennett
  • Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. - Charles Schulz
  • They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body.
  • When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. - Mark Twain
  • The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. - Jerry M. Wright
  • Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing
  • Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. - Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
  • We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.
  • A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip.
  • There is still no cure for the common birthday. - John Glenn
  • Birthdays are like girlfriends, they come and go-unless you enjoy them.
  • Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional. - Chili Davis
  • To me, old age is always 20 years older than I am.
  • You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
  • If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
  • Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
  • Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.
  • Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
  • The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet.
  • Looking fifty is great - if you’re sixty.
  • I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
  • If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
  • After 30, a body has a mind of its own.
  • Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
  • Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
  • It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can’t speak for my twin sister.
  • When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
  • Live as long as you may. The first twenty years are the longest half of your life.
  • When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m five I’ll be 64.
  • Thirty five is a very attractive age; London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty-five for years.
  • Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.
  • About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
  • Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.

Relationships

  • Great men are rarely isolated mountain peaks; they are the summits of ranges. - Thomas W. Higginson
  • I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox. - Woody Allen
  • In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen
  • A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. - Texas Guinan
  • He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland
  • If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one? - Abraham Lincoln
  • Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry
  • The more I see of men, the more I admire dogs. - Jeanne-Marie Roland
  • Women are like Elephants. I like to watch them, but I wouldn't want to own one. - W. C. Fields
  • When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler
  • Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone. - Lenny Bruce
  • Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship. - Oscar Wilde
  • Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use a words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid that area altogether. Trust me - Tim Allen
  • Cosmetics is a boon to every woman, but a girl's best friend is still a nearsighted man. - Yoko Ono
  • Twitter was invented by men. A woman would have chosen a higher character limit.
  • I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. - Bill Cosby
  • If you must have motivation, think of your paycheck on Friday. - Noel Coward
  • True love is like a pair of socks: you gotta have two and they've gotta match. – Groucho Marx
  • I don't have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks. - Groucho Marx
  • Ugly visual: When you're up to your nose in sh*t, keep your mouth shut. - Anonymous
  • If it weren't for women, men would still be wearing last week's socks. - Cynthia Nelms
  • Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy. - Steven Wright
  • I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose. - Woody Allen
  • Love lasteth as long as the money endureth. - William Caxton
  • The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post. - George Bernard Shaw
  • Love is like the measles; we all have to go through it. - Jerome K. Jerome
  • True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. - Erich Segal
  • Sometimes I lie awake at night, & I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than 1 night." - Anonymous
  • "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? – (understandably) Anonymous
  • I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. - Henny Youngman
  • Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet. - Mae West (wink wink)
  • In life; it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out! - Joey Adams

Make You Wanna Wince: Dumbisms

  • If it weren't for the last minute, a lot of things wouldn't get done. - Michael S. Traylor
  • I stand by all the misstatements that I've made. - Dan Quayle
  • The loss of life will be irreplaceable. - Dan Quayle
  • Not only is he ambidextrous, but he can throw with either hand. - Duffy Daugherty, football coach and sports analyst, a word smith he isn't
  • A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. – (understandably) Anonymous, probably from a stoned rocker after a concert
  • If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. - Brooke Shields
  • We are ready for an unforseen event that may or may not occur. - Dan Quayle, VP to Bush 41
  • If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure. - Dan Quayle
  • We are sorry to announce that Mr. Albert Brown has been quite unwell, owing to his recent death, and is taking a short holiday to recover. - Parish Magazine
  • Please provide the date of your death. - from an IRS letter
  • I have opinions of my own - strong opinions - but I don't always agree with them. – President George W. Bush (Bush 43)

Pet Quotes: Funny & Serious

  • When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbet
  • I always like a dog so long as he isn't spelled backward. - G. K. Chesterton
  • Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate. - Sigmund Freud
  • Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. - Roger Caras
  • Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Anne Landers
  • If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain
  • Heaven goes by favor; if it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain
  • A dog is not considered a good dog because he is a good barker. A man is not considered a good man because he is a good talker. - Buddha
  • I've met many thinkers and many cats, but the wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. ~ Hippolyte Taine
  • A dog has lots of friends because he wags his tail and not his tongue. ~ Anonymous
  • The dog represents all that is best in man. ~ Etienne Charlet
  • Love the animals: God has given them the rudiments of thought and joy untroubled. ~ Fyodor Dostoyevsky
  • Every boy should have two things: a dog, and a mother willing to let him have one. ~ Anonymous
  • And God took a handful of Southerly wind, blew His breath over it and created the horse. ~ Bedouin Legend
  • The bird of paradise alights only upon the hand that does not grasp. ~ John Berry
  • A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg. ~ Samuel Butler
  • If I have any beliefs about immortality it is that certain dogs I know will go to heaven, and very – very - few people. ~ James Thurber
  • The Cat. He walked by himself, and all places were alike to him. ~ Rudyard Kipling
  • The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated. ~ Mahatma Gandhi
  • The dog was created especially for children. He is the God of frolic. ~ Henry Ward Beecher
  • There is nothing in which the birds differ more from man than the way in which they can build and yet leave a landscape as it was before. ~ Robert Lynd
  • You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that! ~ Dave Barry
  • All of the animals except for man know that the principle business of life is to enjoy it. ~ Samuel Butler
  • A Horse! A Horse! My kingdom for a horse! ~ Shakespeare
  • A horse gallops with his lungs, perseveres with his heart and wins with his character. ~ Tesio
  • To err is human, to purr, feline. ~ Robert Byrne
  • To err is human, to forgive, canine. ~ Anonymous
  • Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives. ~ Sue Murphy
  • No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome me. ~ Anonymous
  • A dog maybe a man's best friend but a horse made history... ~ Anonymous
  • There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. ~ Ben Williams
  • I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contained. I stand and look at them long and long. ~ Walt Whitman
  • If having a soul means being able to feel love and loyalty and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans. ~ James Herriot
  • I love cats because I enjoy my home; and, little by little, they become its visible soul. ~ Jean Cocteau
  • A house is not a home without a pet. ~ Anonymous
  • In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat. ~ Warren Eckstein
  • Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. ~ Ann Landers
  • Dogs have owners; cats have staff. ~ Anonymous
  • A canter is the cure for all evil. ~ Benjamin Disraeli on horses
  • Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. ~ Joe Gores
  • Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened. ~ Anatole France
  • A dog is the only thing on earth that will love you more than you love yourself. ~ Josh Billings
  • You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us. ~ Robert Louis Stevenson
  • Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes! ~ Theophile Gautier
  • The purity of a person's heart can be quickly measured by how they regard animals. ~ Anonymous
  • We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals. ~ Immanual Kant
  • An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. ~ Martin Buber
  • If all the beasts were gone, men would die from a great loneliness of spirit, for whatever happens to the beasts also happens to the man. All things are connected. Whatever befalls the Earth befalls the sons of the Earth. ~ Chief Seattle of the Suquamish Tribe, letter to President Franklin Pierce
  • There is in all animals a sense of duty that man condescends to call instinct. ~ Robert Brault, robertbrault.com ~ Robert Brault
  • To insult someone we call him "bestial." For deliberate cruelty and nature, "human" might be the greater insult. ~ Isaac Asimov, Isaac Asimov's Book of Science and Nature Quotations, 1988
  • I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. ~ Winston Churchill
  • I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the "lower animals" (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me. ~ Mark Twain, Letters from the Earth, 1907
  • Be it human or animal, touch is a life-giving thing. Has anyone ever had a stroke or a heart attack while cozied up with a pet? I doubt it. ~ Robert Brault
  • I believe in animal rights, and high among them is the right to the gentle stroke of a human hand. ~ Robert Brault
  • Most pets display so many humanlike traits and emotions it's easy to forget they're not gifted with the English language and then get snubbed when we talk to them and they don't say anything back. ~ Stephenie Geist
  • Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet. ~ Colette
  • It often happens that a man is more humanely related to a cat or dog than to any human being. ~ Henry David Thoreau
  • Animals have these advantages over man: they never hear the clock strike, they die without any idea of death, they have no theologians to instruct them, their last moments are not disturbed by unwelcome and unpleasant ceremonies, their funerals cost them nothing, and no one starts lawsuits over their wills. ~ Voltaire, letter to Count Schomberg, 31 August 1769
  • The kind man feeds his beast before sitting down to dinner. ~ Hebrew Proverb
  • Lots of people talk to animals.... Not very many listen, though.... That's the problem. ~ Benjamin Hoff, The Tao of Pooh
  • Man is rated the highest animal, at least among all animals who returned the questionnaire. ~ Robert Brault
  • It is an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man - for precisely the same reasons. ~ Douglas Adams, The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy
  • An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. ~ Martin Buber
  • You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets. ~ Nora Ephron
  • Animals are such agreeable friends. They ask no questions; they pass no criticisms. ~ George Eliot
  • Ever consider what pets must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth! ~ Anne Tyler, The Accidental Tourist
  • No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation. - Fran Lebowitz
  • Cat Law of Selective Hearing "A cat can hear a mouse yawning a mile away, while filtering out the sound of a pleading human just six feet away. - Anonymous
  • Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this. ~ Anonymous
  • There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. ~ Wesley Bates
  • Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want. - Joseph Wood Krutch
  • A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution. ~ Hazel Nicholson
  • There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast. - Anonymous
  • You know your cat is getting old when she quits hunting in the back yard. Now she hunts at your dinner table.- Denny Lyon
  • Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry
  • My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet. ~ Edith Wharton
  • He doesn’t reckon his dog has human feelings, but he sure lets you know when you hurt his instincts. ~ Robert Brault
  • The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog. - Ambrose Bierce
  • Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. ~ Roger Caras
  • No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as a dog does. - Christopher Morley
  • If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. Harry S. Truman
  • A dog is not intelligent. Never trust an animal that's surprised by its own farts. - Frank Skinner
  • The more I see of men, the more I admire dogs. Jeanne-Marie Roland
  • Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone. Lenny Bruce
  • Women are like Elephants. I like to watch them, but I wouldn't want to own one. - W. C. Fields

Political Humor

  • A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. - Texas Guinan
  • He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. - George Bernard Shaw
  • "If we were a dog food, they would take us off the shelf." - Rep. Thomas M. Davis III (R-Va.), in a memo to colleagues about the problem with the Republican brand
  • "Now he tells us that he's the one who's gonna take on the old boys network. The old boys network? In the McCain campaign that's called a staff meeting. Come on!" - Barack Obama, about John McCain
  • "If he's the answer, then the question must be ridiculous." - New York Gov. David Patterson, on John McCain at his speech at the Democratic National Convention 2008
  • "I've been sleeping like a baby. Sleep two hours, wake up and cry, sleep two hours, wake up and cry.'' - John McCain, talking to Jay Leno about his election loss
  • "So?" —Vice President Dick Cheney, responding to an ABC News correspondent who cited a poll showing that most Americans do not believe the Iraq War was worth fighting, March 19, 2008
  • "So what?" –President Bush, responding to a an ABC News correspondent who pointed out that Al Qaeda wasn't a threat in Iraq until after the U.S. invaded, Dec. 14, 2008
  • "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter." –President George W. Bush, in parting words to British Prime Minister Gordon Brown and French President Nicolas Sarkozy at his final G-8 Summit, punching the air and grinning widely as the two leaders looked on in shock, Rusutsu, Japan, July 10, 2008 (Oh, this is funny on so many levels...)
  • "I don't want to be invited to the family hunting party." - Barack Obama, on revelations that he and Dick Cheney are eighth cousins (2007)
  • "You can always tell when the Republicans are getting restless, because the Vice President's motorcade pulls into the Capitol, and Darth Vader emerges." – Hillary Clinton about VP Cheney in 2007
  • "Thanks for the question, you little jerk." -- John McCain, after being asked by a high school student if he was too old to be president. For good measure, McCain then threatened to draft him. (2007)
  • "I've been asked if that nickname bothers me, and the answer is, no. After all, Darth Vader is one of the nicer things I've been called recently." - Dick Cheney (2007 – this guy thrives on negative attention)
  • "A year ago, my approval rating was in the 30s, my nominee for the Supreme Court had just withdrawn, and my Vice President had shot someone. Ahhh, those were the good old days." – George W. Bush, at the 2007 Radio-TV Correspondents' dinner

Holiday: Mother's Day

  • Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills: Dad's Third Wife Day. - Jay Leno, comedian, TV host
  • Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. - George Burns, American vaudeville and TV comedian